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Anonymous
You've had your life, let me have mine!!
by Anonymous
January 30, 2013 at 6:26 AM
Ugh. My ex mil just doesn't know when to stop sometimes. Bwcuase she didn't get to do things in her life the way she wanted, she expects us to do things the way she wanted to.

-when we got engaged. He asked me to marry him one night. We didn't have a ring or anything. We set a date. Three months later my gma gave him her wedding ring to give to me. His mom took us to dinner and made him do.this big stupid proposal infront of everyone with the ring and she cried and.cried and took pics.

-the wedding. She wanted a great big fancy wedding. I didn't want one at all. Dh did wanted a small one, so I agreed. But apparently our wedding and reciption weren't good enough, and a few months later she threw us this stupidly huge reception for all the people that we didn't invite to the wedding (ie all of her friends, bc only family was at the wedding)

-when I got pregnant I told everyone right away. She said I needed to wait until I was 12 weeks before telling anyone. I had already posted it on FB in may when I found out. She wouldn't tell her family, even though they already knew. In July at a family picnic she took my ultra sound and made this grand announcement that she was having a grandbaby.

-she used to take dd to go get her pics done without even telling us. She would just randomly hand me some pics. I know, this one sounds silly... But it was an experience that she was trying to take away from us. She wanted that all to herself.

-she took dd to see Santa and the Easter bunny for the first time without telling us.

-now she wants to take dd for her first hair cut. Umm no! I told her dad if dd comes home with her hair cut then time with grandma will be very limited.

-oh has she also kept taking awful pictures of me pregnant and while I was in labor(even though she was told no) becauae she said she wishes she had those pics taken.

I get it, she didn't get to do the things she wanted and she just wants what's best for her son blah blah blah. But come on! Let us live our lives. We did things how we wanted them done. I am not her! I do not want what she wants or wanted. Funny thing though, she never made a big announcement about me and her son getting a divorce!!

Replies

  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    January 30, 2013 at 6:28 AM
    Bump
  • dallascowboys82
    January 30, 2013 at 6:29 AM
    Just be glad you are rid of her!!
  • AngryBob
    January 30, 2013 at 6:30 AM
    Time to limit time with soul-sucking grandma. Ten bucks says she's considering a grandparents rights case against you.
  • iamcafemom83
    January 30, 2013 at 6:41 AM
    I would have snapped on her a while ago. Sometimes you have to, to get your message heard.
  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    January 30, 2013 at 6:53 AM
    I don't know how she could. I've NEVER denied her to see or spend time with dd. If she calls me and says she wants to see her, I let her. I mail her things dd has made, she calls her and talks to her on the phone.


    Quoting AngryBob:

    Time to limit time with soul-sucking grandma. Ten bucks says she's considering a grandparents rights case against you.

  • AngryBob
    January 30, 2013 at 7:16 AM
    On the contrary, by not denying her time with the kids, you could actually be handing her a case.
    Google whether or nit your state supports grandparents rights. Not all states do, but it is a growing number.
    How often do the kids see her? Does it bear any resemblance to a schedule, such as every weekend, or once a month? How long are the visits? Is she ever alone with the kids?
    Does she buy them things that might be considered essentials, such as food or clothing?
    Gparents rights are established when the parents are divorced (or never married and not living together), or one parent is deceased, and the gparent(s) can establish that they are a significant part of the kids' lives. Judges don't like putting children through too much change after a stressful event such as a divorce or the loss of a parent, so they will actually set up a visitation schedule, like the one between a divorced couple. Of course, grandparents do not have to pay any kind of support, and usually the parents are stuck doing all the transportation. Gparents are also able to make medical decisions for the kids. So they get all the perks, but none od the responsibilities.
    One thing you can do is really cut back on how much time the kids spend with her. make excuses to prevent visits, like scheduling doctor's visits or other activities. Try to be subtle so she doesn't catch on. If she does take you to court, the burden will be on her to prove she is an important part of their lives. Your job is to make that harder on her.


    Quoting Anonymous:

    I don't know how she could. I've NEVER denied her to see or spend time with dd. If she calls me and says she wants to see her, I let her. I mail her things dd has made, she calls her and talks to her on the phone.




    Quoting AngryBob:

    Time to limit time with soul-sucking grandma. Ten bucks says she's considering a grandparents rights case against you.


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