Mom Confessions

angelmj
No, I'm not embarrassed.
by angelmj
January 28, 2013 at 3:09 PM


      http://www.cafemom.com/group/115189/forums/read/17961023/Pray_for_my_baby_final_update 

READ and re-read if you don't get it. The picture I posted in this link is not the same picture my DF posted on FB that upset me. He can post pictures of his son all he wants I just did not want the picture where he has blood and tubes all over him posted. 


        Recently my LO had major surgery (refer to my link for more info on that) and we of course took a picture of him after just to have a picture of him with all his tubes and wires. My DF posted the picture on FB and I asked him to take it down. He later asked me if I was embarrassed of our child's current condition. I told him no I was not, I just felt it was not something to publicly display on FB. My dad ended up sharing it before my DF took it down. I explained to him there are about 400 or more people idk who are not close to us seeing that picture. It's a heart breaking picture of an infant in recovery. I told him I have no problem with showing the picture to select people but not the world. Do you agree with my decision to request they both remove the picture. Does it mean anything bad on my part to not want to display it like that?

Replies

  • nicole2884
    January 29, 2013 at 3:35 PM

    why are your profiles not private, if they were it shouldnt have been shared with so many

    i get it , its personal but the photo doesnt look bad

  • GraceStrickland
    January 29, 2013 at 3:44 PM

    I understand not wanting to post it, and I wouldn't either. I wouldn't criticize people who had posted it though, it's your fiances son too/  But nicely asking to take it down is very reasonable and doesn't warrent an explaination on your part.

  • StrawberryCool
    January 29, 2013 at 4:01 PM

    so i read this this morning.

    but i just re read it.

    would it have been a different outcome if he ASKED you before he posted it?

    or what if he had posted it and just said family was able to see it?

    i agree with both of you.

  • angelmj
    by angelmj
    January 29, 2013 at 4:03 PM

    All of our profiles are private it's just IDK half the people on my DF profile and I know like 3 people on my dads profile and he is that guy him friends are gaming buddies and whores.


    Quoting nicole2884:

    why are your profiles not private, if they were it shouldnt have been shared with so many

    i get it , its personal but the photo doesnt look bad



  • angelmj
    by angelmj
    January 29, 2013 at 4:06 PM


    also once again that photo is not the same photo my DF posted........ Why would I do that then complain about him doing it? The photo he had has blood and tubes sticking out of his chest and shoulder ect...

    Quoting nicole2884:

    why are your profiles not private, if they were it shouldnt have been shared with so many

    i get it , its personal but the photo doesnt look bad



  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous
    January 29, 2013 at 4:42 PM
    Well I think people need to be more realistic about what they are doing. As soon as you take a pic it could end up anywhere. If you lose the camera or if you use a digital camera there is a risk someone you don't want to see it will. I agree there are boundries but let's face it everyone's boundries are not the same. So before you take a pic understand and accept the risks or don't do it. If you take a pic it could somehow end up on the internet, intended or not, right or wrong. I think if it is such a big deal for people then they should be smarter about it. If you choose to take a private pic you also choose to accept the risks involved, don't complain if one of those risks comes through.


    Quoting thanush:

    That's silly. Taking a picture doesn't mean you also want to share it with 300,000 or so people. Not even pictures taken for commercial use let you do that. Even they have rules on how they can be used. Like everything else there are boundaries that we only let people we want, enter. 

    Whats wrong with you anyway... Have some compassion. A picture of one's baby covered in blood and tubes is not same as your bath picture. A parent may take any pic they want so they can show it / or not, when the kids grow up. But every picture certainly do not have to be shared.

    Quoting Anonymous:

    I'm a firm believer that if you don't want people to see the pic don't take it. Problem solved. If you don't want your baby on social media then watch them and ensure no photos are taken without that clear understanding. Personally it does not bother me to have pics of ds on facebook and I never took bath pics where his bits were uncovered. I really wish people would think this stuff through prior to having kids because I am so sick of the omg I'm gonna whine cause my kids pic is on fb posts. Duh. What did you think would happen?



  • Maevelyn
    January 29, 2013 at 4:55 PM

    I dont' think it means anything bad on either part. Everyone copes differently. It's nice that they respected your wishes and you should thank them (particularly DF, since it's his kid too.) 

  • babycakes041903
    January 29, 2013 at 5:04 PM

    I'd definitely be upset then:( I'd tell your fil and df to take them down. That's a private pic for close family.

    Quoting angelmj:


    Oh no that picture I shared was before his surgery, the one he posted was just terrible to see. I mean he had a tube sticking out his chest with blood in it.. It was too much for me to want to show FB. 

    Quoting babycakes041903:

    Is it the same pic u shared? Bc if so then it wouldn't be fair to get upset w him... But if it was a more private pic I could see why you're upset.




  • angelmj
    by angelmj
    January 29, 2013 at 5:09 PM
    I did and they respected my wishes.



    Quoting babycakes041903:

    I'd definitely be upset then:( I'd tell your fil and df to take them down. That's a private pic for close family.

    Quoting angelmj:


    Oh no that picture I shared was before his surgery, the one he posted was just terrible to see. I mean he had a tube sticking out his chest with blood in it.. It was too much for me to want to show FB. 



    Quoting babycakes041903:

    Is it the same pic u shared? Bc if so then it wouldn't be fair to get upset w him... But if it was a more private pic I could see why you're upset.








  • SterlingHeart
    January 29, 2013 at 5:10 PM

    reality creates awareness and support --- every one should count their blessings -- and even thru the tubes and blood that is son and he loves him and is obviously in need of support 

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