Mom Confessions
Automatically, I start to feel the bile rise in my throat. Feeling that, matched with my already deep-seated fears and doubts caused me more butterflies, and not of the lovely variety, in my belly than I've felt in a long time.
So I do what any other woman would do in that position, of course. I get out my compact mirror and investigate. What I see is a slightly raised, black dot on the inner part of my left vaginal lip. I couldn't get a close-enough view, so I got my camera and took pictures, even. After my findings, I resort to good ol' google and type in words a woman never wants to type into a search engine; genital warts. Now I've never had genital warts, or warts of any kind. I've never had an std, and I have always had and only have one sexual partner: my husband. Some of the pictures looked like what I had, while others looked nothing of the sort. I didn't assume it could only be that and stick with that hypothesis without further investigation, I searched other things it could be... But they all led back to sexually transmitted diseases.
So, naturally, my next step is obvious. I wake my husband up, show him, and then... Just stare at him with raised eye brows. I say ''pleeeease tell me you're not with anyone but me...''. I expect him to say something similiar to ''Oh, babe. You know I'd never...'' or '' Oh babe. I am not having sex with anyone but you, stop worrying.'' I expected reassurance and consoling and convincing. What I got? Denial, defensiveness, and blame. I got ''Are you f*cking kidding me?! I promise on our kids I'm not f*cking anyone but you! How do I know YOU'RE not stepping out on me?! You're gonna feel so dumb when the doctor tells you it's nothing, and when you come begging for an apology, I'm gonna laugh in your f*cking face! God, you're so stupid!'' Then he laid in bed, faced away from me, sighed, and is now, I'm guessing, asleep.
Let me remind you, I didn't come at him guns ablaize, pushing him into a corner, accusing him, or anything of that nature. In fact, I thought I was fairly non-chalant about the whole thing. ''Hey babe, can you look at something for me?'' and then basically begging him to tell me there's only me doesn't qualify as accusatory. In this terrifying situation, I could have been mega-bitch, but decided to lay it on him easy.
Long story short. I need some answers to help me sleep better at night until I can get into a doctor, so no better a place to come than a room fulla ladies, hopefully ready and willing to help me out. Give me something, whether that be advice, suggestions, therapy, a good talk. Something.
**It looks almost like a good sized tick. Real black. Kinda tender.**
Replies
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He might have been really offended that you jumped to the conclusion that he was cheating. -
It could be a pimple. Why do you think he's cheating automatically?
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Its not an ingrown hair?
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Could be a small boil or ingrown hair. -
Why did you jump straight to that instead of an ingrown hair, pooped pimple, ect?
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I probably would have gone to the doctor first.
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have you only been with him, him only? Bc almost all STDs can lay doormant for up to a period of years. I would find that offensive too to ask if it was him, what if it was you? If I was him I would have raised an eye brow and said those who accuse do it because they are guilty....
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I'm sorry he went off like that.I dont have any advice to give you since i dont know much about genital warts other than to go get it checked by the doctor.I hope that he only went off like that cause he was grumpy you woke him up,My husbands the biggest asshole to me when hes half asleep.
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It could be an ingrown hair. If someone woke me up over that kind of thing and accused me of cheating, I would probably not react well. -
I would probably go with ingrown hair or boil, but with as defensive as he got best to check it out.