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Daughter had friend stay over last night. This can't be normal?
by Anonymous
October 27, 2012 at 10:11 PM

This is sort of long, but I need some opinions...

Alright, my daughter has a friend in school. They're in 1st grade. This girl doesn't talk at all. I knew about the girl two years ago when the teacher had written me a note about how 'this little girl who doesn't speak' has started hanging out with my daughter. She was basically relaying a message from her mother who wanted to set up a play date to try to get her daughter to be more comfortable around people. Okay, so that was two years ago. Since then, they've become good friends and I hear about her all the time, but she had never been over to play ... until last night.

I didn't realize how awkward the situation was going to be, but let me tell you, it was ODD. It started with simple comments like "What did you girls do in school today?" to "Hey, I like your sweater!" to "What do you want for dinner?" She would not respond to ANYTHING. I mean, wouldn't even look me in the eye. Now, she talks to my daughter -- a lot. They play great together. I finally got to the point of just using my daughter to ask her questions and then she would give me her answer. It was very awkward. I'm generally pretty good around kids and kids tend to like me, but this little gal threw me for a loop.

It gets worse. I'm making pizza last night in the kitchen and all of a sudden this girl gets up and comes and smacks me in the butt and starts punching me. At that point, I'm thinking "omg" but I figure 'okay, anything is better than nothing', so I start acting silly as well and start rough housing with the girls. Let me tell you, this little 7 year old is built like a football player and she's ridiculously strong for her age. She literally tackled me to the ground and almost broke my glasses. She is beyond aggressive. I also caught her punching my daughter in the head. The girl almost acts possessed. It is so weird. Beyond that, she's like ridiculously smart and she does listen when I tell her to do something (ex: go get your pajamas on and brush your teeth). She does have two brothers and I know the one is pretty wild. So, should I just overlook all of this and just assume it's a result of being in a house with rambunctious boys or is this NOT normal at all?

Oh .. and she was trying to french kiss my daughter as well. Her mom called last night too and asked how she was doing because this is the first time she had ever been to a friend's house. I told her she hadn't talked to me but they were playing good together and having fun. Her mom laughed and told me, "oh, she probably won't -- that's just her, but as long as she's isn't biting, punching, or beating you up then all is good." I don't know if I should have said something or not. I didn't because I didn't want to make her feel bad, but this tells me this is apparently normal behavior at home. OMG. Is my child just an unusually good child or is this other girl NOT normal? I was pretty much in shock after her stay.

I want to add a little bit about her family too, seems how abuse assumptions are coming up. I've associatied with her family a bit just because they go to the same school and they're often at functions and what not. Her mother is a well-educated woman. She's actually a physical therapist. Her father is a big-wig at a large corporation. When I first met this family, I was almost intimidated. They have a beautiful home, good jobs, the picture-perfect family. Almost too perfect. I've seen them at the beach before and have seen how they interact with their kids. Nothing ever seemed too strange to me; although, one comment her mother said has stuck in my mind and it really disturbed me. Her daughter was standing by her side at the beach one afternoon and she was saying how she wished her son had her daughter's build and vice versa (her son is skinny; her daughter is more stocky but by no means fat -- she's actually a beautiful little girl). I wish I could have stood up and been a little stronger that day and said something to her mother after that comment because I felt it was SO wrong to say that ESPECIALLY in front of your own child. Now I don't know if this was just a rare comment or if this is something fairly common in that household, but if that poor girls ends up with some eating disorder some day -- I think I will know how it began. Now, her mother is a beautiful woman. Many would envy her good looks and she 'appears' to be a very nice woman ... but like I said, almost too perfect. Something seemed odd to me when I first met them a couple years ago and last night just made me even more worried. Just a weird feeling. I don't even know what to do?


  • Apollos82
    October 27, 2012 at 10:14 PM
    It sounds like the child is autistic and under-treated, to be honest.

    ETA: NOT normal behavior.

    What did you do about the kissing??
  • md3mom
    by md3mom
    October 27, 2012 at 10:15 PM
    Not normal.
  • LovingLifexoxo
    October 27, 2012 at 10:16 PM

    It doesn't sound normal to me.

  • littlesippycup
    October 27, 2012 at 10:17 PM

    Something is a little abnormal there...I'm glad she has your dd for a friend though. Y'all will probably be good for her.

  • PinkieRed
    October 27, 2012 at 10:17 PM
    That is NOT normal behavior! It sounds like the kid is in desperate need of some sort of evaluation.
  • Anonymous 2
    by Anonymous 2
    October 27, 2012 at 10:17 PM

    that is strange. my daughter is 7 and her friends always talk to me....the whole just walking up to you and hitting you thing is strange..but i think u handled it well...the french kiss thing is just freakin weird..

  • 3lighteningbugs
    October 27, 2012 at 10:17 PM
    My son is seven and won't talk to anyone either. The only behavior I see wrong here is her pinching, and hitting especially an adult to gain their attention. I would bring it up to her mom. Even, if she doesn't talk, she should know that those types of behavior are not acctepable.
  • BeAmour
    by BeAmour
    October 27, 2012 at 10:17 PM
    I'd be leary of abuse in the home or some lower functioning Autism.
  • littlesippycup
    October 27, 2012 at 10:18 PM

    and the punching dd in the head. ouch.

    Quoting Apollos82:

    It sounds like the child is autistic and under-treated, to be honest.

    ETA: NOT normal behavior.

    What did you do about the kissing??

  • mommy_me
    October 27, 2012 at 10:18 PM

     not normal

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