No I wouldn't. I had one AMD my mom respected the fact that it was mine and it was private thoughts. It was my stress relief. But I also knew I could go to my mom with anything. I still can talk to her about anything. I hope as my son grows he will feel the same about dh and I. I think a diary is private and needs to say that way. I have one now that dh doesn't read. It's out in the opean and I know I can trust him. If I wanted him to read it I would hand it to him.
by Anonymous 8
October 13, 2012 at 8:17 AM
No when my goddaughter lived with us I promised I wouldn't and I didn't, I made it clear unless she was acting off I wouldn't ever go through her things! But I had rights to make her long into her social media sites at any given time, and I told her phone would be gone through if i thought she was up to something,
But a journal is personal thoughts and feelings and people have their rights to thoughts and feelings
Happily I only went through her phone once, & went on to beating a 24 year olds ass for hitting on her ( thankfully that's all it was)
You're damn skippy, I do....as well as reading notes that she cleans out of her purse and book bag...I don't confront her with what I find because 1. It's a gold mine of information about what's going on in her head, heart and world and 2. She has a right to think her thoughts and fee her feelings....Now you might think that #2 is hypocritical aqs I'm basically invading her privacy while saying she also has a right to it...But, I use what I read to understand her better...She's Autistic and has a hard time expressing herself to someone else but basically wirtes letters to herself or others in her diary...So, I get to see how she's thinking and feeling....Is someone picking on her? Well, that gives me the chance to casually bring up how to handle problems with people while we do dishes together...Is she angry with her (very,very absent) father? Well then, I can talk to her about the choices people make in life and how they affect others while driving in the car....Does she talk about loving her boyfriend (she's 13,lol) then I can talk about love with her...how it changes, how some loves are different, how all love is real but not always the kind of love you can commit your life to, how what she wants in someone will change as she grows and changes....
I don't fee like it's spying because I'm not trying to catch her in trouble....I don't fee like it's fair to use something she wrote in her diary against her, so to speak...If I find in the future something troubling - she wants to have sex,she feels hopeless/suicidal - then I can get her the help she needs for it be it counseling or honest talk about consequences or birth control...
Only if I suspected something dangerous was up. I may not even then either I may have another party skim through it to make sure. But my daughter is 4yo so I'm not at that bridge yet so I'm not sure if I would or not or hand it off to someone else to skim through & re assure me or tell me of any flags etc.