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Anonymous
It was YOUR decision. So no CS!
by Anonymous
October 7, 2012 at 1:14 PM
You find out you're pregnant. Talk it over with your SO and he explains that he doesn't want a baby right now. You don't care and decide to keep it. Do you feel that he should still be obligated to pay CS even though it was YOUR final decision to go through with it?

Replies

  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous
    October 7, 2012 at 2:31 PM

    If he doesn't want the child, then he needs to sign over rights and not pay CS.

    If he's not willing to go to the extent of signing over rights, then he should be paying.

    (I also don't think one parent should have a say in the other parent signing over rights.)

  • CABZS
    by CABZS
    October 7, 2012 at 2:32 PM

    Oh goodness so sick of this.

    YES he should have to pay CS.  He KNEW what he was getting into.

    Just like if a woman decides she no longer wants to be a mother she still has to pay CS!

    If a man CHOOSES to have sex, he KNOWS the possible consequences.  He already made HIS CHOICE, he chose to take the risk.

  • LizzieAnnesMom
    October 7, 2012 at 2:33 PM

    If women are allowed to choose whether or not to parent a child, Why cant the man make the same decision?

    Quoting one_on_the_way:

    So, your proposal is that men have no responsibiltiy in the situation at all.  You know, just like how women have no responsibility in the situation at all.  is that right?

    Quoting LizzieAnnesMom:

    Why is it ok for a woman to be able to write off a child if she doesnt want it but a man cant? If we are going to be fair then they should both either have the same opportunity. No one forces a woman to have an abortion. She is free to give up the baby for adoption.

    Quoting one_on_the_way:


    Quoting LizzieAnnesMom:

    I think men should have the option to just give up their rights if they dont want the child.

    I think if they can do that....they must also go through a procedure on their man parts that carries the risk of possibly never being able to have children again....possible injury to internal organs....possible allergic reaction to medication....increased chance for mental health issues, up to and including suicidal ideation and attempt....cramping....bleeding....etc.  You know, a physical procedure similar to abortion.  And, he should have to walk through a line of picketting people condemning him to hell for his decision.  Hey, we want it to be fair, right?




  • BUFFIE.the.BODY
    October 7, 2012 at 2:33 PM
    No
  • friendlymom5
    October 7, 2012 at 2:34 PM



    Quoting km1970:

     


    Quoting wkukid:

    If you have sex you know pregnancy is a possibility. Everyone involved should have to pay.

     


  • Erna2
    by Erna2
    October 7, 2012 at 2:34 PM

    I agree with this. I hate double standards!!!

    Quoting Anonymous:

    Nope. If her body her choice/ her life her choice is soooo important, and she knows theres a possibility she will be a single mom before she has sex, so no. He should have the same choices. Men should be able to say "I dont want a child" and terminate their rights, just as a woman has the choice to abort or put the child up for adoption if she doesn't want to be a mother. Double standards are ridiculous.


  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous
    October 7, 2012 at 2:34 PM
    Who cares?


    Quoting Anonymous:

    THE OP EDITED HER POST! When I posted this, it was wrong.

  • one_on_the_way
    October 7, 2012 at 2:35 PM

    Exactly.  Things will NEVER be fair in this.  They just can't be.  The real solution here is to have men and women choose carefully who they have sex with and actually have serious conversations about this topic before they are faced with the situation.

    Of course, many people choose to ignore the possibilities and then cry and whine about it when the inevitable happens.  

    There will always be someone with more power in the situation.  Right now....that power is held by the woman simply because it is her body that holds the pregnancy.  If it were the man's body who held the pregnancy, the power would be in his court.  

    I really don't get why people want to try to make this 'fair'.  It is impossible.


    Quoting QueenBof6:

    If you really want to talk about fair, what about the pregnancies that are terminated that the man wants. Nothing he can do about that right. He can't force a woman to have his baby. That's pretty unfair. It's just the way the cookie crumbles due to biology.



    Quoting one_on_the_way:



    Quoting LizzieAnnesMom:

    I think men should have the option to just give up their rights if they dont want the child.

    I think if they can do that....they must also go through a procedure on their man parts that carries the risk of possibly never being able to have children again....possible injury to internal organs....possible allergic reaction to medication....increased chance for mental health issues, up to and including suicidal ideation and attempt....cramping....bleeding....etc.  You know, a physical procedure similar to abortion.  And, he should have to walk through a line of picketting people condemning him to hell for his decision.  Hey, we want it to be fair, right?


  • one_on_the_way
    October 7, 2012 at 2:37 PM

    I can't believe people keep trying to claim that a man 'signing away his rights' is equivalent to a woman having an abortion or giving a baby up for adoption.  

    The real double standard here is that men can have sex without ever the risk of physically being pregnant.....and women can't.  That is soooo unfair!!  Why the double standard?  

    Quoting Erna2:

    I agree with this. I hate double standards!!!

    Quoting Anonymous:

    Nope. If her body her choice/ her life her choice is soooo important, and she knows theres a possibility she will be a single mom before she has sex, so no. He should have the same choices. Men should be able to say "I dont want a child" and terminate their rights, just as a woman has the choice to abort or put the child up for adoption if she doesn't want to be a mother. Double standards are ridiculous.



  • PinkieRed
    October 7, 2012 at 2:38 PM
    Yep! If a woman doesn't want a kid, or can't financially care for one, she can terminate her rights by abortion, adoption, or even (in many states) just leaving the baby (within a certain time period) at a hospital or fire station, and walking away.

    A guy cannot even terminate his rights (including child support) unless another man is willing to step up and legally adopt the kid. That IS a double standard.
    Quoting LiliM:

    No. But unfortunately in our family court system,the woman is the only one given the right to make a decision about becoming a parent.



    Add one more baby mama in Maury.

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