Mom Confessions

Anonymous
I am just so thrilled
by Anonymous
October 5, 2012 at 3:50 PM

I have gone 3 years without child support for my 3 kids during which time, we only heard from my ex a couple of times and I didn't even have a phone number on him. My ex has since gotten married and had children with his wife AND bought a house. We have a court order from when we divorced 3 years ago for $1776 a  month (if you are doing that math, that means that he owes over $60,000). Our kids are ages 6, 8 and 11.

We finally went back to court today, I filed a year and a half ago but most of the time, I didn't even know where he was. He tried to get the child support lowered (yes the child support that he wasn't even paying) based on the fact that he now has a wife and 2 other kids, saying that he couldn't afford that much. The judge told him that he should have thought about that before getting married and having more kids without supporting his own. The judge kept the child support as is and ordered that he pay off what he owes me monthly. He calculated the back payments so that the back child support would be paid off before the oldest graduates from high school (when  child support stops for her).

So now, in addition to him having to pay $1778 a month, he will also have to make the back child support payments of $852 for a total of $2684!!! This is just about 1/3 of his income. And the judge told him that if we have to come back ever again for him not paying, he has no problem sending him to jail. Since he moved out of state and we didn't hear from him for most of that 3 years (6 year old doesn't even, the judge is ordering daytime visitation only in the kid's home town (so he will have to come to our town, stay in a hotel and take them out for the day).

His wife called me pissing and moaning saying they will have to change their whole lives to pay this child support and she thought we had an agreement that he would leave me and the kids alone and he didn't have to pay (this is what he told her, we made no such agreement). I would feel a bit bad for her except, when marrying a man with kids and an ex, who doesn't do their research?  And what kind of woman marries and has kids with a man who doesn't see or take care of his kids? Anyway, I am just so excited, I work but without child support, money has been very tight, I am so glad that now I will have the extra money for my kids, I can even start college funds!!!.

Replies

  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    October 5, 2012 at 8:02 PM

    True but if he doesn't pay, I'll just be in the same situation I am now, meanwhile, he will be sitting in jail and his wife and children will have no income.

    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    I hope he pays. He can't help anyone in jail.

    Quoting Anonymous:


    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    If he never paid before, why do you think he will pay now?

    Because the judge told him that if there is one more problem with him not paying, he will put him in jail



  • UgtaBkdnMe
    October 5, 2012 at 8:38 PM

    I do not understand men who don't pay. My sisters son's father is in jail for not paying.

    Quoting Anonymous:

    True but if he doesn't pay, I'll just be in the same situation I am now, meanwhile, he will be sitting in jail and his wife and children will have no income.

    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    I hope he pays. He can't help anyone in jail.

    Quoting Anonymous:


    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    If he never paid before, why do you think he will pay now?

    Because the judge told him that if there is one more problem with him not paying, he will put him in jail




  • bullemhead
    October 5, 2012 at 8:52 PM

     Yup! Don't plant the seed if you can't afford to feed!!

  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 6:35 AM

    I know right, they would rather sit in jail and have no income then have to be free and able to work and give some of their income to their child

    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    I do not understand men who don't pay. My sisters son's father is in jail for not paying.

    Quoting Anonymous:

    True but if he doesn't pay, I'll just be in the same situation I am now, meanwhile, he will be sitting in jail and his wife and children will have no income.

    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    I hope he pays. He can't help anyone in jail.

    Quoting Anonymous:


    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    If he never paid before, why do you think he will pay now?

    Because the judge told him that if there is one more problem with him not paying, he will put him in jail





  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 6:36 AM

    I mean it's crap that men will go without paying at all but when you go without paying when you know you will end up in jail for it, how does that make sense?

  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 6:37 AM


    Quoting bullemhead:

     Yup! Don't plant the seed if you can't afford to feed!!

    Amen. Sucks to be him, I guess he shouldn't have had more kids but he knew he was evading a child support order, he had to know it would come back to bite him in the ass one day

  • angie729
    October 6, 2012 at 6:39 AM
    Dont count your chickens before they hatch. Just becase the judge ordered him to pay does not mean he will.
  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 6:46 AM


    Quoting angie729:

    Dont count your chickens before they hatch. Just becase the judge ordered him to pay does not mean he will.

    I understand there is a possibility that he won't but, it would be really dumb of him. Either he can stay out of jail, re-budget so he can pay child support and support his wife and new kids or he can sit in jail and his wife and their kids will have no income.

  • Anonymous
    by Anonymous - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 6:48 AM

    Also, I have been supporting the kids by myself for 3 years so if he doesn't pay, nothing changes for us but he will go to jail and his wife and kids will have no income (she is a SAHM) so it hurts him more then it hurts me if he doesn't pay

  • mommy_2_be_2010
    October 6, 2012 at 7:17 AM
    Why can't they take it out of his checks

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