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Anonymous
I am just so thrilled
by Anonymous
October 5, 2012 at 3:50 PM

I have gone 3 years without child support for my 3 kids during which time, we only heard from my ex a couple of times and I didn't even have a phone number on him. My ex has since gotten married and had children with his wife AND bought a house. We have a court order from when we divorced 3 years ago for $1776 a  month (if you are doing that math, that means that he owes over $60,000). Our kids are ages 6, 8 and 11.

We finally went back to court today, I filed a year and a half ago but most of the time, I didn't even know where he was. He tried to get the child support lowered (yes the child support that he wasn't even paying) based on the fact that he now has a wife and 2 other kids, saying that he couldn't afford that much. The judge told him that he should have thought about that before getting married and having more kids without supporting his own. The judge kept the child support as is and ordered that he pay off what he owes me monthly. He calculated the back payments so that the back child support would be paid off before the oldest graduates from high school (when  child support stops for her).

So now, in addition to him having to pay $1778 a month, he will also have to make the back child support payments of $852 for a total of $2684!!! This is just about 1/3 of his income. And the judge told him that if we have to come back ever again for him not paying, he has no problem sending him to jail. Since he moved out of state and we didn't hear from him for most of that 3 years (6 year old doesn't even, the judge is ordering daytime visitation only in the kid's home town (so he will have to come to our town, stay in a hotel and take them out for the day).

His wife called me pissing and moaning saying they will have to change their whole lives to pay this child support and she thought we had an agreement that he would leave me and the kids alone and he didn't have to pay (this is what he told her, we made no such agreement). I would feel a bit bad for her except, when marrying a man with kids and an ex, who doesn't do their research?  And what kind of woman marries and has kids with a man who doesn't see or take care of his kids? Anyway, I am just so excited, I work but without child support, money has been very tight, I am so glad that now I will have the extra money for my kids, I can even start college funds!!!.

Replies

  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 7:38 AM

    Someone else said that and I took the advice, I have not told them yet. While I don't think it will be an issue because either he pays or he goes to jail, I do think it's best to wait

    Quoting epoh:

    Don't count your chickens before they hatch. I wouldn't tell them anything of the sort until you have a check in your hand.

    Quoting Anonymous:

    OH and I forgot to add that I will be telling my kids tonight that they each get to pick one activity to be in (they each wanted to but I didn't have the money).


  • Anonymous 3
    by Anonymous 3
    October 6, 2012 at 7:39 AM
    You say that but i can feel it eating at u im laughing so hard


    Quoting Anonymous:



    Quoting Anonymous:

    Sorry but karma is gunna bite u in the ass for this one, his new wife may be a piece of work but that doesnt mean their kids deserve it, how would u feel if their kids ended up homeless i bet you would feel l like shit then, yeah i understand why u want the money but remember there are innocent vicitims in this called children and its your fault now if they dont get birthdays, christmas, or even food just remember thst u ruined their childhood hope your real happy for that extra income, and for people to say its the womans fault well guess what love is blind obviously since op got with him lol let your concious be your guide

    I wouldn't feel like shit at all, I would look at her and ask why she didn't get a job to support her children as I had to. I didn't bring their children into this world, what happens to them is NOT my issue. My kids have gone without support from their father for years, I am getting the money that is owed to them so that THEY can have better lives, the lives they should have had all along. If my ex goes to jail for not paying child support, it wouldn't be me that ruined their childhood, it would be him for not paying and his wife for staying with him while he didn't pay.


  • epoh
    by epoh
    October 6, 2012 at 7:39 AM
    I learned the hard way to never tell my children anything about money or plans, especially when it concerns my ex.

    Best of luck to you!


    Quoting Anonymous:

    Someone else said that and I took the advice, I have not told them yet. While I don't think it will be an issue because either he pays or he goes to jail, I do think it's best to wait


    Quoting epoh:

    Don't count your chickens before they hatch. I wouldn't tell them anything of the sort until you have a check in your hand.



    Quoting Anonymous:

    OH and I forgot to add that I will be telling my kids tonight that they each get to pick one activity to be in (they each wanted to but I didn't have the money).


  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 7:46 AM

    It's a little bothersome that you would feel that it's my job to make sure their kids are supported, even if it means my kids not getting support from their dad but I know what I am doing is right. My kids deserve to be supported by both parents

    Quoting Anonymous:

    You say that but i can feel it eating at u im laughing so hard


    Quoting Anonymous:



    Quoting Anonymous:

    Sorry but karma is gunna bite u in the ass for this one, his new wife may be a piece of work but that doesnt mean their kids deserve it, how would u feel if their kids ended up homeless i bet you would feel l like shit then, yeah i understand why u want the money but remember there are innocent vicitims in this called children and its your fault now if they dont get birthdays, christmas, or even food just remember thst u ruined their childhood hope your real happy for that extra income, and for people to say its the womans fault well guess what love is blind obviously since op got with him lol let your concious be your guide

    I wouldn't feel like shit at all, I would look at her and ask why she didn't get a job to support her children as I had to. I didn't bring their children into this world, what happens to them is NOT my issue. My kids have gone without support from their father for years, I am getting the money that is owed to them so that THEY can have better lives, the lives they should have had all along. If my ex goes to jail for not paying child support, it wouldn't be me that ruined their childhood, it would be him for not paying and his wife for staying with him while he didn't pay.



  • mamadolce
    October 6, 2012 at 7:54 AM
    This & dont tell your kids anything until you get a check.


    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    If he never paid before, why do you think he will pay now?


  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
    October 6, 2012 at 8:16 AM

    I am not going to tell them yet BUT the fact that he knows that if he misses even one check, he will go to jail, where he won't make any money and his wife and their kids won't have any income unless she gets a job, makes me think that he will take this more seriously then before

    Quoting mamadolce:

    This & dont tell your kids anything until you get a check.


    Quoting UgtaBkdnMe:

    If he never paid before, why do you think he will pay now?



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