Mom Confessions

buttersworth
Is it Fair ? DH vs. Me
December 1, 2011 at 11:07 PM

I wrote this already and it doesn't seem like it posted. Sorry if this shows up a 2nd time.

My DH went to work early one day, 2-1/2 hrs. I had a very stressful day with the two babies who had colds. I asked him to leave a half hour early which would mean he got 2 hours of O/T. He wouldn't compromise with me.

The next day, he said he was working late. Usually that means 1-2 hours. Instead, he comes home 5-1/2 hours later ! Yes, that's in addition to a normal 8 hr day. And he never bothered to call me at any point. I called him at work about 8 :00 pm to see what was up, and he said he was leaving soon, but wasn't home for another hour (commute time 20-30 min.).

I was resentful that the first time he wouldn't compromise with me, and he knew I was irritated. Then he pulls this the very next night?

I don't just have two babies. I have a dd in middle school, and 4 pets. I rely on my DH. We do chores together when he gets home...neither one of us gets break. I have not had time away from the children in well over a month. One baby gets up 1-3 times a night.

I know he's trying to provide for us and he's at work. But I resent the fact that he makes a decision regardless of my pleas that I'm stressed out and he won't even compromise a little. I think he could've given me that extra half hour, and I also think working 5-1/2 hours O/T was excessive, especially without calling me once that whole day.

I think hes being unfair. He acts like he doesn't see it. I think he just wants to play dumb so he can get his way.

Replies

  • mhaney03
    December 2, 2011 at 11:36 PM

    No sympathy from me.  I get that life gets stressful at times and shit, but honestly as a military wife this kind of complaining annoys the ever loving shit out of me.

    You do need time off, but to get that you need to put your foot down with this man.  Don't bash him for working, but make sure you push the point home that you need time away from the kids and he needs to be aware of YOUR needs.  If he doesn't listen then he's an asshole.

  • babyboy117
    December 2, 2011 at 11:39 PM

     I would get rid of all those pets. Sounds like you have too much on your hands.

  • babyboy117
    December 2, 2011 at 11:47 PM

     by the way.. sorry everyone is pretty much bashing you and comparing themselves. I think you should be able to vent without getting bashed. But anyways.. My husband is deployed and I have a 1 year old and I get overwhelmed sometimes because I can't even take a 10 minute shower without interruption. I think everyboy needs atleast 15 minutes of "me" time everday. And when you dont ever have "me" time it can be very difficult.

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