In the Bedroom
***Made a mistake and urinate while on top... boy! Was I embarrassed... he didn't get mad doe... he thought it WAS funny.. ** the TV was on AND we were doing it AND something funny was on so we stopped to listen and I WAS laughing so hard that I fell out the bed! Kml! Just thinking about it...
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My df likes to make my pussy fart during sex I hate it but he insists. One time after sex I went to get up and all the air came out. He starting laughing which made me laugh and in turn made it sound like my pussy was laughing lol -
Farting while having sex was about it. -
bump for later
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On vacation in St Martin a few years ago, my husband and I had just finished having sex. There was a knock on the door and it was our friends who were dropping by our room to say good bye. I quickly put on a dress without worrying about undies. Anyway, as we were hugging and saying good bye to one another, their little daughter noticed something running down the inside of my leg and asked me what it was. I almost died. I don't think that anyone else heard the question
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Pimp Daddy = dh Hooker= me
One day pimp daddy decide this Hooker was to keep an anal plug in all day well i was in walmart and forgot that i had it in and bent over to get some thing from one of the lowwer shelves when it shot out my ass and out in to a main isle when and older lady brought it back and said loudly it is ok sweety i found your Ass Bullet
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I'm sure there's something but I can't remember anything in particular. We've had a couple close calls with his kids coming into the room. Before I moved in, he was remodeling their bedrooms & had the kids in beds in his room. So we would take advantage of the living room. There were a couple times, just after redressing, a kid would come out, sleep-walking or half asleep. Too close for my comfort!! -
Quoting Terri_K:
Pimp Daddy = dh Hooker= me
One day pimp daddy decide this Hooker was to keep an anal plug in all day well i was in walmart and forgot that i had it in and bent over to get some thing from one of the lowwer shelves when it shot out my ass and out in to a main isle when and older lady brought it back and said loudly it is ok sweety i found your Ass Bullet
ok I am laughing at all of these posts but this one is the best!! HILARIOUS! -
Kml! I would have been sooooooooo embarrassed...
Quoting mandy18192:
Quoting Terri_K:
Pimp Daddy = dh Hooker= me
One day pimp daddy decide this Hooker was to keep an anal plug in all day well i was in walmart and forgot that i had it in and bent over to get some thing from one of the lowwer shelves when it shot out my ass and out in to a main isle when and older lady brought it back and said loudly it is ok sweety i found your Ass Bullet
ok I am laughing at all of these posts but this one is the best!! HILARIOUS!
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I have alot! lol..me and hubby have a crazy everyday sex life and after almost 6 years it has its moments! One time we were getting it really good, we had a big 4post bed with big head board and foot board, and it was really high off the ground, well out of no where the bed just collapsed, like the foot board came unattached and the end of the bed hit the ground! we had completly broke the bed... Another one was we were getting it good in the shower and I like a dummy reached up and grabbed the shower curtian rod, Wasnt thinking, well it broke,(im only like 100 lbs LOL) but i slipped when it broke, luckily hubby and I are comfortable with each other so we just laughed and continued... there are probably so many more that im missing out on... lol
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Ok I have three I can think of. I'm not committed to anyone so..
First .. my ex Jon. First night we got it on.. I was drunk as a skunk. I dont know why I got so drunk but anyways.. he was going down on me and I guess I kept passing out.
I woke up every hour or so and on the third hour I looked down and went DUDE YOURE STILL DOWN THERE?! I dont remember his response.
Sometime after that I sat straight up wide awake. He put his finger in my butt and I thought 'oh god what if I poop on him, I had no warning!"
I didn't think it. I said it. :X
Then theres the time I was giving him road head.. which I'm really experienced with (oh back in the day the things we did lol) and he grabbed the back of my head and shoved me down right as he hit a dip in the road (a pothole probably) I barfed cheese pizza all over his lap.
I was mortified, he took off his shirt, wiped down his dick and looked at me like are you gonna finish? To this day he tells everyone its the best head he ever had. (I think its weird!)
Then.. there was the guy in Ohio.. I was again drunk.. and he was just a fling. I told him NO repeatedly to sticking it in my ass and he did it anyways. I was drunk and just kind of gave up on fighting him (I like anal.. but.. ya gotta poop really good first..) and all of a sudden he started gagging and ran for it
Big chunks of shit EVERYWHERE.
I was too drunk to drive home so I had to sleep it off. He was all for it, when I came to though, he was whacking off next to me.
Guess it didnt bother him that much.