Mom to Mom

Am I asking too much?
May 1, 2013 at 2:23 PM

My daughter is five years old and has a room of her own that also houses toys for the two little siblings. I ask her to pick up her room each day, just a few things picked up helps to keep it a playable space. I am so frustrated because she can't even pick up one or two things.  Today I asked her to pick up her room ....which only had a small amount of toys on the floor and most for them were books. I have been checking on her every 10-20 min between dishes and laundry. I noticed I was getting no where with praise and persistence so I changed it to picking only up the books. I gave her about 30 min and returned to her room. Nothing was picked up....I flipped out! I took all her books on the floor to the yardsale pile...the. Proceeded to ask her if she liked having things....she says yes and wants to keep her stuff but doesn't want anything to do with being responsible for them. I am so fed up with fighting over this matter. I told myself at one point that this is a battle that I would give up on and just go to her room daily and pick it up myself....but how does that help her?? It doesn' I am back to being mad about this issue daily almost . So with all that you have your younger children clean their spaces and if so what do you do to help them be involved? And if not please tell me why not....I have got to find a way to make piece with's tearing me up to be the vicious yelling mommy I am becoming with this me please!


  • Janet
    by Janet
    May 1, 2013 at 6:43 PM

     I have one that is good about picking up and the other one won't lift a finger. He is so stubborn!

  • mawith2
    by mawith2
    May 1, 2013 at 6:51 PM
    I once took everything out of their room for a full month. It really did the trick. They literally had two paper towel rolls and a piece of chalk and chalk board the whole time. Now not only do they clean their room when asked they also use their imaginations more than they did. When I did give toys/books back I cut back on them by about half (got rid of all they barely played with and kept all they loved most.)
  • MamaSnaps
    May 1, 2013 at 6:59 PM

    At 5 she is capable of picking up but, will most likey need supervision or structure to "get it." 

    Be specific: Pick up all of the books and put them away. I will be back in 10 minutes.

    If they aren't picked up then you pick them up and "throw them away." Throwing away meant stashing them somewhere and when the child did 'get it' they'd get a toy back from the "garbage" as a reward. 

  • goddess99
    May 1, 2013 at 7:01 PM

    My dd is 10 and it's still a battle. I don't really have any good advice because I've taken things too but it doesn't really help. My dd seems to just clean when there is something on the line. Like, we aren't going to the skating rink if there is still stuff all over your floor. If that works, it's short lived because the next day it's a disaster again. I've started just closing the door lol.

  • achorney
    May 2, 2013 at 8:01 AM
    My kid learned Early if you don't take care of your stuff, you do not have stuff.
  • EarlGrayHot
    May 2, 2013 at 1:00 PM

    Taking away her books will impact her ability to read; i don't think that's good idea.  Ask her why she won't pick up her things.  E xplain sh needs to help you.

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