I guess some kids have been calling everyone gay at school and my 10 year old has been really bothered by it. She knows what gay and lesbian is and she knows that we don't judge people who are, but at school these kids are being hateful when they say "gay." When we were talking about it I told her to just ignore the kids and not let it bother her. She said it really really upsets her and I asked why and she said because she thinks she might like girls that way.
I went with a gut response which was "You're ten, you have a lot of time to figure that out." She was quiet for a little bit and asked if I would still love her if she was gay and I assured her that I would always love her no matter what.
This isn't the first time she's said something like this, but I've always thought she was just so young that she couldn't possibly know that about herself. But is it? What do you think? Is 10 years old too young to know your sexuality?
March 25, 2013 at 8:16 AMNo, she's not too young; I was around that age when I started puberty so it's the "normal" age. I think it's great that you told her you will still love her because that's very important, perhaps talk to her a little more about it and ask her why she feels that way.
by Eve-marieMarch 25, 2013 at 8:26 AM
She knows herself. I think she could be gay or bi, and is trying to work it out in her mind, get comfortable with the idea for herself. She is feeling you out too, because she doesn't want you to be disappointed in her for her choices. Talk to her. Knowing that she can talk to you about anything should put her mind at ease.
by MamaMoopsieMarch 25, 2013 at 9:29 AM
That's what I thought when she told me a 7 (almost 8) that she wanted to marry a girl. I figured she just thought boys were icky and liked being around girls...but then she brought this up and she does understand the difference in friendship and being attracted to someone, but I'm not sure she fully understands her own interests, whether she still thinks boys are gross or not.
I think she's too young. Most 10 year olds aren't sexual yet andost aren't interested in the opposite sex. She's probably just confusing her normal interest in girls and lack of interest in boys with being gay.
She's not to young to know how she feels, but you did good in letting her know that she has a lot of time to figure it out. Even if she knew for certain that she was "gay" or straight or whatever, just let her know that she still has years and years to grow and learn and doesnt have to suddenly fall in love with someone just cuz she thinks she understands her feelings. Even "straight" people are just as crazy when it comes to their feelings of love, etc.
March 25, 2013 at 5:21 PMI'd say she's too young.