rdnkwskygrl
Advice to become stay at home mom.
January 16, 2013 at 3:38 PM

Hi all. I need some advice. i am wantting to become a stay at home mom. I just had my son last monday and loving every minute. I have an 8 year old and a 3 year old at home as well. all boys. i wasworknig for a company that i loved but not making very much $. i went out on disability oct 1st for almost delivering my son early.

i just delivered last week and am contemplating going back. daycare for allo 3 boys where i live is at minimm 2200. i dont even bring that home a month. my husband is working so we r trying to figure out if we can do it soley on one income. also if i do stsay home when, and how to tell work.

any advice?

Replies

  • lavender909
    January 16, 2013 at 4:32 PM

    Mom's have it tough.  They are put into a situation where they need/want to care for their children, than also are expected to work outside of the home and bring in money.  It's crazy.  Stay home with your children, they need you and you need them. I found something where I can work from home on my own schedule and around the kids schedules.  At the same time I make some extra money that is not going right back into child care!  The best part I can be with the kids.

  • opal10161973
    January 16, 2013 at 4:45 PM

    You need to sit down with your DH and figure out a budget that will work with your bills and income.  If it's not enough to cover everything, then see where you can cut back on your bills and start living more frugally.  There is a frugalistas group on CM.  Look it up for some great advice. 

  • goddess99
    January 16, 2013 at 5:19 PM

    Just make a list of all your bills including what you spend weekly/monthly on food and household items. If your dh makes more than what's needed then I would do it. Why work so every cent can go to someone else raising your kids..? Just tell work that you decided to stay home and raise your family.

  • goddess99
    January 16, 2013 at 5:22 PM

    I agree with the cutting back on bills too. We cancelled cable years ago. We just cancelled our landline. We only have Tracfones but that's all we need. Just those 2 things save us about $100 each month. I also meal plan which helps and saved us money as well.

  • MamaMoopsie
    January 16, 2013 at 5:31 PM

    The cost of child care is insane! I have four daughters now, but a couple years ago when we had just three and I was working while DH looked for work after being laid off we were trying to figure out how we'd pay for childcare. One of the girls was in school, so she'd only have a couple hours after school where she had to be taken care of, but for the two little ones alone everywhere was asking for $200 a week per child! That's $1600 plus whatever it would have cost to have the oldest there for a couple hours each afternoon. We decided it would just be best to not put the kids in daycare and just work out a schedule where one of us would always be home with the kids. In the end he ended up getting a job that made it possible for me to become a stay at home mom.

    If you do decide to be a stay at home mom, you need to let your work know ASAP so they can start looking for a replacement. If you're on maternity leave, you might be required to pay some of that money back.

  • Mrs.Bolin
    January 16, 2013 at 8:56 PM

    I have been a stay at home mom for almost 3 mos now. I have a 4 yr old daughter and 4 month old daughter.  I have worked for 11 yrs at the same place since i was a senior in highschool. Never thought i would ever get the opportunity to be home with my babies. Im blessed.My baby sitter wasnt able health wise to watch my kiddos anymore and we couldnt find anyone to watch them for what we were paying my former babysitter. My husband still barely makes to much with out me working now to get wic or anything. I love money. Now that i dont have any, its a huge adjustment. We have netflix but i also want to keep my cable so we are struggling but making it right now. Things are tight. We have about $100 a week for groceries. Thats for food and toilet paper and such. Thats nothing.It sucks. We live on ramen noodles and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. My husband is on disability right now for huring his back at work. He cant work overtime right now and workers comp doesnt pay enough. I cloth diaper during the day, i wash my clothes in cold water. make my own laundry detergent. Im slowly learning how to save money. Just one day at a time. I was on maternity leave when i had to quit. I put my two weeks notice in a week before i went back. My boss was like a second mom to me so she completly understood. You just gotta do what you gotta do and try to do some planning and put thought into it ahead of time

  • chinakae007
    January 16, 2013 at 9:11 PM
    Start couponing!! It has helped me out so much. Nothing crazy like what you see on tv. :)
  • xxjadedhaloxx
    January 16, 2013 at 9:15 PM

    If you can afford it, do it!  I love all of the time I have with my girls.

  • dreambig4u2
    January 17, 2013 at 12:19 AM

    Hi there..  YES!  I have LOTS of advice for you.  What I can tell you about myself???  I have been married for over 20 years, and was a stay at home mom.  Thank You God !  The opportunity allowed me to raise my kids and I wouldn't trade it for the world... However, I have been on the other side of stay at home mom with the feelings of "is this it?", low self esteem, lack of adult interaction...  Then, major medical issues made me have to get back into the work force...  When I was faced with not having an option of being a stay at home mom, it truly gave me a completely different perspective of how fortunate I was.... WHAT  I can tell you now???   God works in mysterious ways... I am now in a position to be a stay at home mom again.  HOWEVER, I run a VERY successful career from home and money is no longer the issue... I will show you how.... Trust me girlie, been there done that... yep, yep.... there are ways to make it all happen... 

  • momamanda
    January 17, 2013 at 10:00 AM

    If it were me and I wasn't even making enough money to cover day care costs I would stay home. set a budget with the money your hubby makes and make sacrifices where they need to be made. It may mean you might have to skip out on little conviences but in the end being home with your kids will pay you back :0) I hope it works out for you!