Mom to Mom
How would you explain a step parent to a 5 year old? My fiancé introduces my daughter as his daughter, is that ok? I dont mind it but sometimes my daughter will question me why he says she's his daughter, i dont want to confuse her but he's the only male figure she's going to have in her life. He tells her he's her big buddy and that he is going to take care of everything she needs but the whole big buddy thing will only last for so long...she won't be 5 forever , she knows her bio dad but he doesn't want to be in her life anymore so he doesn't call or see her anymore.. So how would you explain what a step father is and what it means to have one?
Replies
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Let her dictate their relationship and what she calls him. As for what to tell her about why he calls her his daughter, tell her that he loves her like one and some day soon it is going to be true... I wouldn't invest too much worry.
Quoting D_fluff:
She calls him by his name but when she talks about him she calls him her big buddy.
Quoting stickyfingers:
well you can talk to her and as her if it bugs her that he says he is her dad...tell her when you married him he became her stepdad and ask her what she wants to call him. just be open about it and respect her feelings. what does she call him? -
Ask HER what SHE wants... She may be 5 but she still has opinions
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I would say that daddy loves her but can't be there right now for her. (step dad) is here and he loves you too. I'd leave it up to her whether or not to call him daddy or by his name, or whatever. Stress that they both love her at that age, imo.
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My oldest DS has been my Dh's son always and he has always called Daddy. He has also been around Dh since before he was a year old.