Mrs.Bolin
for those of you that have been through this.....Update
January 7, 2013 at 3:08 PM

Does your man curse, tell you to shut up etc, in front of your kids? I understand my man is stressed and tired and he has been working nights 7 days a week. He is a wonderful husband, my bestest friend ever and a wonderful daddy. Im very lucky to have this man. but over something little and stupid that we argue about, he told me to shutup in front of my 4 yr old today and dropped a F-bomb. I told him not to talk to me like that in front of my daughter and he told me to shutup again and walked out of the room. Serously? There is no exuse for that. I grew up with my dad as an alcoholic and he and my mom constantly fighting and my dad never hit my mom but he pushed her alot. I know my husbands parents argued alot when he was young and still do but never physical. It bothers me cause i never wanted my man to be like that with me in front of my kids. Any of you experienced this?

So i brought it up to him this morning while my baby was asleep and my daughter was at school. I told him that i know i havent been innocent in the past either(he rolled his eyes at me) cause i know he didnt wanna hear it. I told him that i know you are tired and stressed from work. When we are disagreeing over something if you would please not talk to me in front of the kids like that. He says "quit sayin stupid things all the time ". I said that it dont bother me when the kids arent around cause it dont. I said it again..please dont talk to me like that around the kids. I grew up with it and i dont want that with my kids. He brought up a bunch of crap that didnt have anything to do with it and i looked at him again and said that none of that matters. All i asked you was that if you would not talk to me like that around the kids. i just looked at him and walked out of the room before i blew up. I was mad. I was eating a sandwich and got pissed and threw it in the trash cause i lost my appitite. Grrrrrr. i went in the other room to fold laundry cause i clean when i get mad.After a hour, im in the kitchen loading the dishwasher and he comes in there and says something about the sandwich in the trash(normaly he gets pissed and yells). He said something about it but was totally cool. He looks at me and says " i will try not to do that stuff around them". Im thinkin..yeah right. But oh well. It took an hour for it to get through that hard head. Its cool now but that boy had my blood boiling all over again. Thanks everyone for the support. :). I knew i wasnt wrong for feeling how i did but its nice to hear it from you guys.


Replies

  • 1squishysmom
    January 8, 2013 at 7:37 PM

     Aw, hun, I hope he listens. To have your children see him so angry isn't good. Plus, him showing disrespect towards you is teaching them that they can do this, too. They are still young now, but it will stick. Good Luck with your talk.

    Quoting Mrs.Bolin:

    there have been a couple of times that he has come to me on his own later on and appologized. but yeah, he does need a break bad but cant get outa it. Im gonna sit down today and talk to him. He had a couple nights off from two vacations hours that he used. 

    Quoting 1squishysmom:

     My husband would NEVER even dream of talking to me like that! I am so sorry. We have been married for a very long time (21yrs) and that kind of disrespect never occurred.

     My husband also works a lot. We own 2 small businesses, meaning no days off. He certainly doesn't sit at a desk (he has ADHD) and he still wouldn't talk like that to me, let alone in front of the children.

     Your husband needs a break badly and a serious talk. Our oldest son(20) has a temper when he's tired. His gf sometimes gets rude comments from him, but immediately afterwards, he always hugs her and tells her that he's sorry, that he's just so tired. They don't have children yet, but when they do, I certainly hope he can hold his temper a bit.

     Everyone gets tired. You have a choice in how you deal with it

     

     

  • DanaG70
    by DanaG70
    January 8, 2013 at 7:45 PM

     As for your update? I would NOT under any circumstance, put up with any man to speak to me in that manner in front of the kids or not.

    What he is doing to you is verbal abuse and just as bad if not worse than physical. Have a little more backbone and tell your husband that you are NOT stupid or say stupid things. He has no right to cuss at you or tell you to shut up because he doesn't agree with you. I don't care if he is stressed or not!

  • travelbunny
    January 8, 2013 at 8:28 PM

    no

  • Mrs.Bolin
    January 8, 2013 at 8:43 PM

    oh yeah,lol. i told him that. I get pissed when i get stressed too. i can understand that completely.But still. it is not right to do that in front of the kids. It pissed me off the couple times that he has done it and im not gonna put up with it. I let him have it. Thanks girl!! :)

    Quoting DanaG70:

     As for your update? I would NOT under any circumstance, put up with any man to speak to me in that manner in front of the kids or not.

    What he is doing to you is verbal abuse and just as bad if not worse than physical. Have a little more backbone and tell your husband that you are NOT stupid or say stupid things. He has no right to cuss at you or tell you to shut up because he doesn't agree with you. I don't care if he is stressed or not!


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