bbyB10
moms with teens , I am going thru it for the 1 st time
by bbyB10
December 7, 2012 at 11:19 AM
Hi, my son came home with a portable WiFi device from his dads house which we are.in.the middle of a custody battle and with the technology today I just can't trust Nothing that comes from the other party , I'm gonna make this short. I do not allow my kids on the internet unsupervised. He.hid the WiFi from me for about 3 weeks , and I took it away . He is mad at me now and IDK what to do.he is not.talking to me and I really hate this . Not only can I not trust that his dad won't bug it or something but no kid of mine is allowed to be online unsupervised ! My son says that I don't like him because I can't trust him . I had him at 17 and this is the first time this happens , I have worked , taken care , fought for him, and been his ONLY provider his whole life and IDK how to.handle this ?? report

Replies

  • delanna6two
    December 7, 2012 at 11:32 AM

    Hope you are able to work this out...

  • bbyB10
    by bbyB10
    December 7, 2012 at 11:35 AM
    What would you do ?


    Quoting delanna6two:

    Hope you are able to work this out...


  • delanna6two
    December 7, 2012 at 1:07 PM

    I have 3 teens and just take it a day at a time...it is very challenging sometimes.  Mine are allowed the internet and supervised.  I was going to say maybe let him keep the gift but supervise his time with it like with other things....the only thing that bothered me is that you mentioned about it being bugged or not trusting...and I would understand this...I think I would be a little wary of it too.

    Quoting bbyB10:

    What would you do ?


    Quoting delanna6two:

    Hope you are able to work this out...



  • bbyB10
    by bbyB10
    December 7, 2012 at 5:48 PM
    Thanks !


    Quoting delanna6two:

    I have 3 teens and just take it a day at a time...it is very challenging sometimes.  Mine are allowed the internet and supervised.  I was going to say maybe let him keep the gift but supervise his time with it like with other things....the only thing that bothered me is that you mentioned about it being bugged or not trusting...and I would understand this...I think I would be a little wary of it too.

    Quoting bbyB10:

    What would you do ?





    Quoting delanna6two:

    Hope you are able to work this out...





  • Knightquester
    December 7, 2012 at 6:15 PM

    I would just buy your own wireless router if you're concerned and then create your own security password to where only those in your home can get on it, or just you if you prefer that. 

    As per trusting, it's hard I know but trust is earned not given is what I let my kids know.  I do believe however by a certain age a child should have the commonsense they were raised with to know what is right and wrong.  My children who are just entering their teen years still ask to use the computer and tell me what they're getting on when they're on it.  They will even come to me if they have issues or some stranger starts talking to them via some online game or site.

    I have taught my children since they were little the dangers of the Internet and how to deal with it, so if your son is unawares of these dangers maybe try to educate him before letting him jump on and move about.  What we do is have a set amount of time the kids are allowed on the computer or video games, whichever they choose, and the devices are in the middle of the house where I can walk up and view whatever they're doing at any time I wish.

  • DazeDelights
    December 7, 2012 at 7:36 PM
    This

    Quoting Knightquester:

    I would just buy your own wireless router if you're concerned and then create your own security password to where only those in your home can get on it, or just you if you prefer that. 

    As per trusting, it's hard I know but trust is earned not given is what I let my kids know.  I do believe however by a certain age a child should have the commonsense they were raised with to know what is right and wrong.  My children who are just entering their teen years still ask to use the computer and tell me what they're getting on when they're on it.  They will even come to me if they have issues or some stranger starts talking to them via some online game or site.

    I have taught my children since they were little the dangers of the Internet and how to deal with it, so if your son is unawares of these dangers maybe try to educate him before letting him jump on and move about.  What we do is have a set amount of time the kids are allowed on the computer or video games, whichever they choose, and the devices are in the middle of the house where I can walk up and view whatever they're doing at any time I wish.

  • Lonely-wifey
    December 7, 2012 at 7:47 PM
    I am kind of going through the same type of things with my son. I was advised by my friend that my son was going through the whole mommy syndrome. That he was trying to pull away from and lean more on his father (who is a truck driver and hardly home) this made sense to me. It feels as though my job as a mom was cut in half. I hurt over this but, he is listening to his dad and can talk to him and they are laughing more as well.
  • bbyB10
    by bbyB10
    December 7, 2012 at 11:47 PM
    His Dad is a toxic , hateful person, who is using my kids to destroy me , he is our ex BATTERER , and NOTHING good comes out of him , I have done everything in my power to protect him, but the system , I could not beat even with my police reports and his long criminal and drug and violent background


    Quoting Lonely-wifey:

    I am kind of going through the same type of things with my son. I was advised by my friend that my son was going through the whole mommy syndrome. That he was trying to pull away from and lean more on his father (who is a truck driver and hardly home) this made sense to me. It feels as though my job as a mom was cut in half. I hurt over this but, he is listening to his dad and can talk to him and they are laughing more as well.

  • toybar02
    December 7, 2012 at 11:54 PM
    i think you did the right thing, and im pissed that his father didnt ask you first or at least let you know that he gave him the wifi, i agree no child should be online unsupervised, as long as hes under your roof he has to follow your rules , hes mad now but hell get over it, kids always get mad then when bad things happen they tell you mom you was right, so stick to your guns, you are right you cannot trust kids especially since he wasnt honest about this
  • bbyB10
    by bbyB10
    December 7, 2012 at 11:56 PM
    Thank you , I DO NOT speak to the other party , we do our exchanges at a sheriff station


    Quoting toybar02:

    i think you did the right thing, and im pissed that his father didnt ask you first or at least let you know that he gave him the wifi, i agree no child should be online unsupervised, as long as hes under your roof he has to follow your rules , hes mad now but hell get over it, kids always get mad then when bad things happen they tell you mom you was right, so stick to your guns, you are right you cannot trust kids especially since he wasnt honest about this