by kim8934December 10, 2012 at 5:45 PM
I wasn't sure of the age of your son, so I'm guessing about 13. Have the device checked out for anything you think might be questionable. It is your choice what technology you want to make available to your son. I, on the otherhand, believe in making my kids technology savy. Everything in our house is safeguarded, the wifi, phones, etc.
I also wouldn't allow phones at a certain age, but now the phones have wifi, so, a lot of the stuff is unavoidable. the internet is everywhere, so it's almost impossible to supervise all their access to it, but you can teach them about making smart choices regarding the sites they visit.
I do think it is devious of your STBX to give him something he knows you don't approve of, make sure you make note of the date and give the info to your lawyer.
by Chyna34December 10, 2012 at 7:32 PM
It needs to documented or seen by a trust worthy friend. who can back you up on this. Until the battle is over. I would also seek legal advice on how to keep this from happening again. Im a mother of 5 as well and i dont allow my kids to be online either unsupervised. It will take some time for your son to understand its only for his best interest and not just because. I hoope you stay in good spirits within this matter.
by angiroseDecember 10, 2012 at 7:56 PM
Well with my exsperience with raising two boys successfully thru teenage years the advice I could give you is, Make sure your not holding the trust issues you have against the x onto your son. I believe he was wrong in not telling you he had it. But honestly a child without internet is a dog without a bone in todays world. Supervised of course. One thing about teenage boys is you dont get many chances before they start really rebelling. Why say you dont trust him on internet unless there is a reason. Let him have the same access to the internet at your home, supervised and timed. But on your own device. Some parents are ok with keeping their children from all the changes in the world. To do that only leads to rebelling when you arent watching and lying so they can be part of the friends circle.
Plus I am fully aware of the dealings with a unreasonable x. As mine is one himself. I have learned to not pay any attention to that stupid things he does. And make it very clear to my child that we share that he has his rules at his dads, and my rules at my home. Hold strong to the way you feel and your rules. But also keep your son in the loop with whoever hes wanting to be in contact with thru the internet.Most teenages arent doing anything wrong on the internet. Just chatting with friends. Who are the ones they confide in when they need to talk.
Just my opinion tho. I have a very close relationship with all my boys. And I couldnt imagine not having one of them not talking to me.