Mom to Mom
My son(4years old) sometimes wake up early, like 7/730 am and he wakes me up. One night I was sleeping at my boyfriends house with my son,(he has a son too that is 4 years old too), my son went in the bedroom and was calling my boyfriend's name asking him a questio. My boyfriend didn answer and my son kept calling his name waiting for him to answer.He then screams at me saying get out of the bedroom, and I say he just wanted to ask you a question. My boyfriend says Im sleeping I want him out my son doesnt do that, Im slepping he cannot wake me up when Im sleeping. And he got my son out of the bedroom and slammed the door. I got upset and he told me to leave.H said I should teach my son better behavior not to wake anyone up at 730 am, or if he was sleeping.
Now I feel like my son didnt do anything wrong , he came nicely and was trying to talk, I feel he could have just answerd my son question and ask him to leave because he was still slepping, and lock and close the door.
He didnt have to slam the door, or yell at him.
I think I dont want to see my boyfriend again, because Im afraid he is going to keep doing it. He wants to marry me and everthing, but i dont think I can tolerate his temper sometimes.
Do you think Im overeacting? Is it normal what he did to my son?And he told us to leave the house because I got upset. I told him he dint have to scream at him, or slammed the door, he could just have answered his question. He got mad at meand asked his son to go inside of the bedroom, he told me to leave and he closed his bedroom door
Replies
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Call it quits before it gets worse. Your son needs to be #1 priority and him yelling at him for asking a question was way out of line. Huge red flag. -
I believe that you need to dump this guy. Anyone that has that type of temper should not be around your son at all.
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Yeah... he was wrong.
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You're not over reacting, your bf is. Please do not even consider marrying that ass until he can learn to control himself. And people don't change.
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Kick that bastard to the curb!!! How would he react if you did that to his child? Oh wait, you wouldn't, bc you have respect for him and his boy. I'm divorced and about to be remarried and am expecting. But long ago I made sure DF was a perfect fit for my son. And our child is his first bio child, and he knows that the discipline is done by mommy or daddy only! He can talk to me about it if he feels the need, or when our son is born we can come to terms on how to discipline him. But ANYBODY, bf, so, DH, even, yells at my little boy(almost 8, not so little anymore lol) there's gonna be hell to pay especially if he did nothing which it sounds like he didn't. How could you continue to be w someone who tells at your child over waking him up??? You don't want your boy to be scared of him. Does he treat his own son like that? I'm not trying to bash you! I'm really not. Sorry if it seems like it. You were not over reacting. You were not in the wrong, he is. -
I wouldn't think twice about leaving a man who treated my son like that. -
Not a man I would continue to see personally. He overreacted to a child just because that child didn't act just like his son does? Not your son's fault that at home he is free to come into mom's room and wake her up when he needs something and didn't know he couldn't do that at his house. This guy also sounds like a spoiled brat. What grown person throws a fit like that just because they are tired? That's what two year olds do.
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First let me state that I prob would've shoved him out the bed for reacting that way, but that would be that initial mama instinct.
Now in analyzing the full situation, I think both parents are wrong. You both failed to have routine and boundary conversations overviewing expectations of when staying over with the kids.
In the handling of the situation, some ppl just aren't that great at being woken up from their sleep. While he may not have responded with the reaction you expected/wanted, he did respond. It seems there was an opportunity for you to diffuse the situation before it escalated to the point of yelling and slamming doors.
You BOTH owe your son an apology:
1. Not discussing, then properly communicating expectations to him
2. The boyfriend for his behavior -
If someone was doing tht to my daughter, I woud leave thm, because a child doesn't deserve to b treated like that and I would never ever let anyone treat my daughter like that. I don't think your overreacting at all. I say kick him to the curb, your son doesn't deserve that crap and neither do you.
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Wow. So can babies not cry when hungry? What happens I his son has a bad dream or wets the bed or is sick?? 7:30 is not early!! We are out the door by 7:30 for school. Does your bf not work?