The Mom Dictionary

[Liansmommie]

[Liansmommie]

TOWELS: See “FLOOR COVERINGS”

[Liansmommie]

UNDERWEAR: An article of clothing, the cleanliness of which ensures the wearer will never have an accident.

[Liansmommie]

UTOPIA: See “BUBBLE BATH”

[Liansmommie]

VACATION: Where you take the family to get away from it all, only to find it there, too.

[Liansmommie]

WALLS: Complete set of drawing paper for kids that comes with every room.

[Liansmommie]

WASHING MACHINE: Household appliance used to clean blue jeans, permanent ink markers, loose change, homework, tissues and wads of gum.

[Liansmommie]

“WHEN YOUR FATHER GETS HOME”: Standard measurement of time between crime and punishment.

[Liansmommie]

YARD SALE: Heart-wrenching emotional process wherein Mom plans to sell kid’s outdated toys and clothing that she decides at the last minute are treasured mementos she can’t bear to part with.

[Liansmommie]

“YIPPEE!”: What Mom would jump up and shout if the school year was changed to 12 months. See also “YAHOO!”

[Liansmommie]

ZUCCHINI: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it.