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betsystipo
the what ifs
July 20, 2011 at 6:27 AM

Do you play the what ifs in your head?  I do!  I have been really trying to work on not doing it as much.  Mainly its in regards to the boys.....for example today Z woke at 4:50...I tried to get him back to sleep but he just wouldn't go.  So then the what ifs start running thru my head.  Whats wrong?  What if he's miserable?  Is he sick?  Should I make them take a nap?  All the questions start running thru my head.  And now he's sitting next to me saying his belly hurts....

Replies

  • LivinDeadGurl
    July 20, 2011 at 8:43 AM

    Usually, no. 

    I guess I am too laid back.

  • betsystipo
    July 20, 2011 at 8:47 AM

    Lucky you!  I worry about Z much more than I should.  Turns out - he threw up and then was fine!  He seems to do this alot in the summer and I'm wondering if its from drinking when he swims (like yesterday we went to a local lake.)  I'm gonna try to keep track of it.  But still 4:50 wake up was not cool!

    Quoting LivinDeadGurl:

    Usually, no. 

    I guess I am too laid back.


  • CoolMommyofboys
    July 20, 2011 at 9:04 AM
    I try not to- I'm pretty laid back and I have God on my side so that helps

    After reading the story about the bridesmaid that pushed the soon to be bride in the pool, I started thinking "what if" cuz my oldest has been pushed in the pool twice lately- the youngest did it this last time
  • betsystipo
    July 20, 2011 at 9:25 AM

    I do that w/ the little boy who was killed on the way home from camp....that mother must do it constantly!

    Quoting CoolMommyofboys:

    I try not to- I'm pretty laid back and I have God on my side so that helps

    After reading the story about the bridesmaid that pushed the soon to be bride in the pool, I started thinking "what if" cuz my oldest has been pushed in the pool twice lately- the youngest did it this last time


  • CoolMommyofboys
    July 20, 2011 at 9:51 AM


    Quoting betsystipo:

    I do that w/ the little boy who was killed on the way home from camp....that mother must do it constantly!

    Quoting CoolMommyofboys:

    I try not to- I'm pretty laid back and I have God on my side so that helps

    After reading the story about the bridesmaid that pushed the soon to be bride in the pool, I started thinking "what if" cuz my oldest has been pushed in the pool twice lately- the youngest did it this last time


     

    what happend to him?  I didn't hear that story

  • johnny4ever
    July 20, 2011 at 9:52 AM

     Yes I do...

  • CoolMommyofboys
    July 20, 2011 at 9:55 AM

    my husband went with his parents and sister (her husband and my niece oh and his sister is pregnant) to a funeral about four hours away a month or so ago...I couldn't help but think "what if they are in a car accident?"             yes, I would still have my parents          BUT the other half of my family was all in that vehicle...I can't imagine loosing all of them at once

    "what ifs"          can really eat a person up  :(          I used to worry a ton...I've really relaxed as I got older- my health has improved a whole lot because of it

  • betsystipo
    July 20, 2011 at 11:15 AM

    it happened in NYC, i can get the story...but he was 9, walking home from camp and was abducted.  turns out the person who took him chopped him up and saved the pieces for the parents to bury!  it was awful!  the child had begged the mom to let him walk home from camp, and she did....

    Quoting CoolMommyofboys:


    Quoting betsystipo:

    I do that w/ the little boy who was killed on the way home from camp....that mother must do it constantly!

    Quoting CoolMommyofboys:

    I try not to- I'm pretty laid back and I have God on my side so that helps

    After reading the story about the bridesmaid that pushed the soon to be bride in the pool, I started thinking "what if" cuz my oldest has been pushed in the pool twice lately- the youngest did it this last time



    what happend to him?  I didn't hear that story


  • betsystipo
    July 20, 2011 at 11:23 AM

    Here's the story I was referring to - 

    Boy's Dismembered Body Has All Parents Asking 'What If?'

    Posted by Jeanne Sager 
    on July 13, 2011 at 11:55 AM

    refrigeratorThe story of little Leiby Kletzky, the 9-year-old boy who went missing on his walk home from day camp in Brooklyn, has officially entered the zone of parental nightmares. Cops are reporting they have found Leiby's body. Or rather, pieces of Leiby'sdismembered body.

    Some sicko has cut up the Orthodox Jewish child and left his remains behind in a refrigerator for his parents to bury. It's the sort of news that could send a parent over the edge, and I wouldn't blame the Kletzkys for burrowing into their grief today. They must be full of "what ifs."

    According to reports, their 9-year-old begged his mom to be allowed to walk home from day camp. He usually rode the bus, but his parents wrote a letter to camp that said he wouldn't be climbing on board. He was supposed to meet his mom at 5 p.m., but he never showed.

    I'm not his mom or dad, but I think a normal parent would sit there wondering: What if I didn't give in? What if I made him ride the bus? What if I went to school that day and picked him up? What if we'd picked another day camp? What if we opted to keep him home this summer? What if we went on vacation this week? What if ... what if ... what if.

    We can't live in what if land. As parents, we need to think about the consequences of our actions, but we can't see around every corner. Plenty of 9-year-olds wander around the streets with nary a problem, and on the flip side, plenty of bus accidents occur in America. There's no way to anticipate a creep grabbing a sweet little boy off of our neighborhood streets, taking him home, and dismembering him, then placing him in the refrigerator. If that thought went through our minds, frankly, we as parents would be paralyzed, unable to function. We need, instead, to be cautious but optimistic in life. That's the best way, the only way (?) to give our kids the cliched roots and wings.

    Police have taken a man named Levi Aron into custody, a man who lived in the home where little Leiby's body was found. Here's hoping he's the guy who did this and that police can convict him, so the Kletzky family can at least find justice for their child.

    Has this story stopped you cold today?

     

  • HTMommy
    by HTMommy
    July 20, 2011 at 11:33 AM

    I what if about things from my past, like what if I stayed with my ex, or what if me and so and so stayed together. I what if about fantasy, what if we could fly? What if we moved into the apt and didn't move in with my parents?

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