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Are you still friends with your bridesmaids?
June 23, 2011 at 11:32 AM

If you had bridesmaids at  your wedding, are you still friends with them?

Skip the Bridesmaids if You Want to Have Friends

on Jun 23, 2011

If you really want to torture a friend and make her hate you, by all means, make her a bridesmaid. Oh it doesn't outwardly seem like such an awful "honor," but the fact is, most women hate being bridesmaids more than five extra pounds during bikini season.

Don't believe me? Consider the phrase, "always a bridesmaid, never a bride," or the way Pippa Middleton was described as being so envious of her sister, the princess. Think of the movie Bridesmaids. The fact is, being a bridesmaid is expensive, time-consuming, and yes, sometimes even envy-inducing as well. Just ask the British bridesmaid from hell who stole all the bride's bachelorette party money and vanished.

Awesome. Of course I had my own bridesmaid from hell, too.

I was married more than eight years ago, but this woman's behavior still stings. She had been a close high school friend, but we had drifted apart. Still I remembered that she told me she would be mad if I didn't ask her to be a bridesmaid. So I did, with the caveat that she was welcome to say no and I wouldn't be hurt at all.

Instead she said yes and proceeded to complain about everything, from the food we served to the cost of the dresses. She talked about me behind my back to the other bridesmaids openly (which they told me). She refused to participate in the bridal party gift to the bride, which would have cost her $20, but instead created a really awkward moment where I thanked everyone and she had to tell me it wasn't from her.

Worst of all, she sent me passive-aggressive cards talking about past relationships and basically saying, "Gee I hope this one works." The lady was insane. And by the end of it all, I (and all the other bridesmaids) hated her. Even having her stand up for me was more than I could handle. She and I haven't spoken in eight years, but even now, when I think of it, I am deeply annoyed.

The fact is, a bad bridesmaid can ruin a friendship. If I had it to do over again, I would have had my sister and my two best friends and that's it. Unless you're swimming in very good, awesome friends and can afford to buy each maid her dress for her, then my advice would be to skip the bridal party and just enjoy a drama-free wedding.

Did you have a bad bridesmaid?


  • LancesMom
    June 23, 2011 at 11:41 AM

    Yes but I haven't seen them in a long time!

  • spunkyldy
    June 23, 2011 at 12:03 PM

    I didn't have any because we went to the court house, my hubs has been in the military and we were quite far away from family and friends so there was no point in having a big wedding, however I have been a Bridesmaid a couple times and I loved it, I did feel honored and we never had any drama, just good fashioned girl time and we were all in the same weddings (we are all married now) I haven't seen them in a while since hubby and I moved back home but we keep in touch.

  • ChelsieAMH
    June 23, 2011 at 12:50 PM

    unfortuantley i dont....they ended up going on with their lives and we no longer talk. its kind of sad just when you thought you had true friends. but now i am fortunated to have the people in my lives now so its so much better.

  • mashonad07
    June 23, 2011 at 1:06 PM

    We eloped. But I am still friends with my girls from elementary school junior high and high school. We call our selves the CW7. HEEE HEEE super cheesy.

  • RayneofTerror
    June 23, 2011 at 6:03 PM

    my sister in law was my one and only bridesmaid. and we still talk all the time... i let her pick her own dress the only rule was it had to be pink. she ended up wearing a beautiful pink dress she already had because she wore it to prom her senior year. 

  • Maries_Mom23
    June 23, 2011 at 6:04 PM

    Yup...they're my cousins!

  • johnny4ever
    June 23, 2011 at 6:41 PM

     I didnt have any

  • fineyouguyswin
    June 23, 2011 at 7:17 PM
    Yes we still talk but rarely.
  • crazymomof2374
    June 23, 2011 at 10:21 PM

     Yes, we talk at least once a month.

  • PEEK05
    by PEEK05
    June 23, 2011 at 10:35 PM

    My husband and I took up my dad's offer on sending us out to Vegas to get married. :) He gave us a few other destination choices but we chose Vegas because we had just turned 21 and wanted to experience it fully. It was a lot of fun but we did not have a bridesmaid or any bridal party at all. We followed our wedding up with a helicopter ride at night over the strip and downtown Vegas.

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