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Short2014
Guidance Please
September 30, 2013 at 10:15 AM

I am new wife and step-mom.  I've been with my now husband 1 year and his son has always loved me. My husband even said that it was different for him to take to someone as quick as he has me.  We have been married for 1 1/2 months and since that time, his ex-wife's behavior has went over board and she has been putting my step-son up to do mean things at our home. His behaviors have been horriable and its not like him. He is usually a great kid but now that we are married, its been really hard.  If you all have guidance or suggestions, please help!

 

Replies

  • WifeyC
    by WifeyC
    September 30, 2013 at 10:21 AM

    First, how do you know BM is putting him up to anything?

  • whatIknownow
    September 30, 2013 at 10:23 AM

    What do you mean Mom has been "putting him up to do mean things?" What mean things, and how old is he?

  • JustaSM231
    September 30, 2013 at 10:26 AM
    How old is SS? What exactly is he doing? How often does your DH have visitation?

    How do you know that BM is putting SS up to his behavior?
  • whatIknownow
    September 30, 2013 at 10:41 AM

    I see that you wrote in another thread, "she has put theirlittle one up to taking clothing out of the home without permission, back talking, scraming, lying and all the things that you should not have to deal with."

    Why do you think his mom is behind this behavior? these sound like typical child behaviors to me.

    Also can you describe what taking clothing out of the home without permission means? Was it his own clothing? Most kids consider their own clothing to be their own property, and therefore would not necessarily ask permission to take it out of the home. Where did he take it?

  • Short2014
    September 30, 2013 at 10:43 AM

    I have heard her tell him to do things over the phone.

     

  • whatIknownow
    September 30, 2013 at 10:47 AM

    What did you hear her tell him, specifically?

    Also what is his father doing about his behavior?

    What is the custody arrangment?


    Quoting Short2014:

    I have heard her tell him to do things over the phone.




  • Short2014
    September 30, 2013 at 10:47 AM

    I know that bm had told him to do these things because I've have personally heard her tell him to.  He has also told us that he was told to lye and say he need this or that b/c quote mom said if I didn't I will get in trouble when I get home.  We get him two days thorugh out the week and eow. 

  • WifeyC
    by WifeyC
    September 30, 2013 at 10:47 AM

    For probably the 5th time - WHAT IS HE DOING?

    Quoting Short2014:

    I know that bm had told him to do these things because I've have personally heard her tell him to.  He has also told us that he was told to lye and say he need this or that b/c quote mom said if I didn't I will get in trouble when I get home.  We get him two days thorugh out the week and eow. 



  • whatIknownow
    September 30, 2013 at 10:49 AM


    Sometimes kids will say "mom told me to do this" to keep from getting in trouble. What did his mom supposedly tell him to do? Can you give specific examples?

    Quoting Short2014:

    I know that bm had told him to do these things because I've have personally heard her tell him to.  He has also told us that he was told to lye and say he need this or that b/c quote mom said if I didn't I will get in trouble when I get home.  We get him two days thorugh out the week and eow. 



  • kim8934
    by kim8934
    September 30, 2013 at 11:05 AM

    not to bash, but was she on speaker phone?  then there is no way to know exactly what she said.

    I know how kids can twist the truth.  my kids told SM that there was no food in the house.  She addressed it to me and my comment was, there is no 'junk' food in the house and there is plenty of fruit, veggies and yogurt if they want a snack.


    Quoting Short2014:

    I know that bm had told him to do these things because I've have personally heard her tell him to.  He has also told us that he was told to lye and say he need this or that b/c quote mom said if I didn't I will get in trouble when I get home.  We get him two days thorugh out the week and eow. 


     

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