Homeschooling Moms

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rsrangel
How do you handle your child's bad days
April 27 at 5:05 PM

I understand everyone has bad days, but I don't get to miss work just because I'm in a bad mood or don't feel like doing work.  So when my child has a bad day (which seems like almost every day lately), I don't let him miss school work.  He's always been difficult wilth school since Kindergarten and has no desire to learn anything.  Anything school related is torture, even when I try to make it fun with games and art (which he usually loves).  He's 9 by the way.  Our days HAVE to be structured because I work too.  Since Kindergarten we've gone back and forth between him going to school and me homeschooling him.  For me, it was easier to homeschool because him being in school was nothing but problems.  He'd refuse to do work or just write whatever answers so he could be done, and they would be wrong  He isn't advanced, but does understand the work.  He just doesn't want to apply thing thinking part to come up with the answer.  He never cared (and still doesn't care) about the consequences.  He hasn't been diagnosed with any learning disorders, unless laziness is a disorder.  The thing is that when he wants something, he suddenly has no problem applying himself.  We do have somewhat of a reward system but i'm not real big on those.  I'm not going to dangle a prize in his face and tell him that he can have it once he does his work.  If you can't tell, 4 years of this has me a little frustrated....

Replies

  • ablackdolphin
    April 27 at 5:19 PM

    Are you able to mix up where you do school? Some days in his room, outside, in the living room, in the kitchen, at the library, at a coffee shop, etc.  Do you think that might help him.

    I know with my DD once she's mastered something there is no beating a dead horse.  I've really had to rethink my conditioning. Meaning, I always feel the need to finish a worksheet but is that in her best interest if she already understands the concept and can apply it? So, I now watch for signs of her losing interest and try to determine if she gets it...if so and only half the worksheet is done, we move on  KWIM?

    Themed days also work for us.  I have a calendar on the fridge and use every holiday as an excuse to get her excited about school.  Earth day, May Day etc.  In fact, DH is at the store picking up some stuff I need for a craft for flowers.  I plan to do a craft but will also try to find other things around flowers that day...maybe bees too. 

    My DD also does so much better when I'm sitting right there with her the whole time.  She gets distracted so easily otherwise.  So, I really try hard to give her my full attention and when I cannot I have her do things like time4learning, which we use to supplement.  At least she's still learning something. 

    Not sure if any of that helps....hope you find some solutions.  It's not fun to have lots of bad days!

  • jen2150
    by jen2150
    April 27 at 8:25 PM
    I have multiple back up plans. I also give them choices. If they don't want to do something then we just switch gears and do something else. As long as they are learning then I am happy. If my sons complain I pile on the work if they ask me politely to do something then I listen to them and we do something else. In the real world when you have a problem you go to your boss and ask to do things a different way. It is what works for us. I think in early elementary it is important ot make learning a fun experience. It is what works for out family. Kids also need to learn to voice their problems and opinion without complanining. I hope you find a balance that works for you.
  • rsrangel
    April 27 at 8:57 PM

    Thank you SO much for taking the time to reply.  I love ALL your ideas.  I've gone ahead and jumped on your idea about switching up where he does school.  My kids do much better when they know what to expect and when to expect it, so I'll make it the same every week....like grandma's house on Mondays, living room on Tuesdays, outside on Wednsdays, etc.   I also like the holiday thing.  I'm going to search holidays and add them all the the calendar now.  Thank you again, I really appreciate it.  How old is your daughter?

    Quoting ablackdolphin:

    Are you able to mix up where you do school? Some days in his room, outside, in the living room, in the kitchen, at the library, at a coffee shop, etc.  Do you think that might help him.

    I know with my DD once she's mastered something there is no beating a dead horse.  I've really had to rethink my conditioning. Meaning, I always feel the need to finish a worksheet but is that in her best interest if she already understands the concept and can apply it? So, I now watch for signs of her losing interest and try to determine if she gets it...if so and only half the worksheet is done, we move on  KWIM?

    Themed days also work for us.  I have a calendar on the fridge and use every holiday as an excuse to get her excited about school.  Earth day, May Day etc.  In fact, DH is at the store picking up some stuff I need for a craft for flowers.  I plan to do a craft but will also try to find other things around flowers that day...maybe bees too. 

    My DD also does so much better when I'm sitting right there with her the whole time.  She gets distracted so easily otherwise.  So, I really try hard to give her my full attention and when I cannot I have her do things like time4learning, which we use to supplement.  At least she's still learning something. 

    Not sure if any of that helps....hope you find some solutions.  It's not fun to have lots of bad days!


  • paganbaby
    April 28 at 12:49 PM

    Back when we did typical homeschooling, cookies were the answer,lol. If he was having a bad day we'd take a break and bake cookies. While we're doing that I'd try to figure out what was bothering him. If it was the school work we'd switch it up. If it was a personal thing, I'd talk him through it. Most of the time it was a work issue though.

  • mem82
    by mem82
    April 28 at 12:55 PM
    VODKA
  • Precious333
    April 28 at 1:00 PM
    We do what we can and each bad day may look.different. sometimes it calls for a day off. Sometimes it calls for multile breaks or thinking outside the box, changing atmospheres or subjects. One day it took all day to do one math page because my son didnt want to do it.
  • Precious333
    April 28 at 1:00 PM
    Lol!!! For you or them? Jk

    Quoting mem82: VODKA
  • mem82
    by mem82
    April 28 at 1:03 PM
    Lol some days, me, them, the dogs whatever

    Quoting Precious333: Lol!!! For you or them? Jk

    Quoting mem82: VODKA
  • KrissyKC
    April 28 at 1:09 PM
    I get this from my eldest the most. She is 12. She is also right on the edge of moodiness, laziness, etc.


    She needs dicipline, structure, and I feel the same as you about them learning they don't just get a day off because they want one.

    However, my pushing for these things often backfire more than help.

    I'm learning that school work is not the same as going to work. Going to work, you get paid and have some choice and control over your job. Hopefully, you don't stay at a job you really dislike for very long. Schooling is more about education. I would rather my kids learn well and love to learn. Rather than feel like they are punching the educational time clock.

    Your son sounds discouraged and had been getting more negatives from schooling than positives.

    What do you have set in place that sparks his interests and gets him excited? Can you take a year and follow his interests in science and social studies and electives? You can build in the structure with his maths and language arts. Kinda balance it.

    If he enjoys robotics, you might look into the Arduino stuff.. it is cheaper than legos and has all kinds of downloadable lessons. Get a reward system where he can earn bits parts and pieces to add to his kit. It can be done the same with any hobby/interest. If he likes camping, he can earn camping equipment and camp outs. If he likes to skate, he can earn time at the rink...

  • SuperMommy408
    April 28 at 7:08 PM

    I needed some last week lol!!


    Quoting mem82: VODKA


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