Homeschooling Moms

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paganbaby
Is this a selfish reason to homeschool?
October 8, 2013 at 11:13 AM

My 6yo has been home for a three day weekend and I LOVED it. It was so nice to have her home and that made me realize, I miss her. She was the only one who didn't go to pre school so I was used to having her home with me. She was my buddy :-)

Now during the week I really don't have much time to spend with her. After school I pick up her and Michelle (a little girl I baby sit). All of us go to the REC center, do homework, eat snack, play at the park, come home cook dinner, then it's bath, teeth and bed. On the weekends I catch up on house work and run errands. I just feel like her childhood is slipping away while I'm busy doing other things.

She's doing fine in school, but I'm really, really considering pulling her out next year. The thought of sharing her day and watching her learn and grow is very appealing.

Is that selfish of me?

Replies

  • AutymsMommy
    October 11, 2013 at 10:02 AM


    I might actually suggest that you wait until a week or two into the new school year. Otherwise, she may get caught up in all the "back to school" excitement and SAY she doesn't want to come home, only to realize that the excitement is short lived, lol. That way she can say "meh, tried it".

    Well, either that or have her make the decision during the summer (early summer) BEFORE the back to school hub bub starts.

    Quoting paganbaby:

    This is true. Nothing's set in stone yet. We still have to wait until next year and see if she she still wants to come home. I would love for her too, but in the end I'll have to respect whichever choice she makes.

    Quoting AutymsMommy:


    I'll give my pov :)

    I would view it as selfish to take a child from any working environment, against their wishes, just because a parent WANTS something different - by working environment I'm assuming the child's educational, physical, and emotional needs are being met.

    Now, the OP has went on to clarify that dd wants to be home too, so it's all really a silly argument for anyone to have - if mom and child both want the same thing, it isn't selfish on anyone's part, kwim?

    Quoting KickButtMama:

    I honestly don't understand why some would view that as selfish. It would only be selfish if you thought she'd be getting less of an education with you, which wouldn't be true. 






  • paganbaby
    October 11, 2013 at 10:29 AM

    That's actually a really good idea. I don't have to file my affidavit until October, so that would give her plenty of time to decide.

    Quoting AutymsMommy:


    I might actually suggest that you wait until a week or two into the new school year. Otherwise, she may get caught up in all the "back to school" excitement and SAY she doesn't want to come home, only to realize that the excitement is short lived, lol. That way she can say "meh, tried it".

    Well, either that or have her make the decision during the summer (early summer) BEFORE the back to school hub bub starts.

    Quoting paganbaby:

    This is true. Nothing's set in stone yet. We still have to wait until next year and see if she she still wants to come home. I would love for her too, but in the end I'll have to respect whichever choice she makes.

    Quoting AutymsMommy:


    I'll give my pov :)

    I would view it as selfish to take a child from any working environment, against their wishes, just because a parent WANTS something different - by working environment I'm assuming the child's educational, physical, and emotional needs are being met.

    Now, the OP has went on to clarify that dd wants to be home too, so it's all really a silly argument for anyone to have - if mom and child both want the same thing, it isn't selfish on anyone's part, kwim?

    Quoting KickButtMama:

    I honestly don't understand why some would view that as selfish. It would only be selfish if you thought she'd be getting less of an education with you, which wouldn't be true. 







  • Christie1952
    October 12, 2013 at 1:15 PM

    Go for it!

  • Mommynay2
    October 13, 2013 at 9:55 AM
    I don't think that is selfish at all. You are the one that is working more to take control of the educational portion in her life. To want your child home with you is great, other parents want to just get rid of their child any chance they get. I respect the need for a break, but when you want to have more time off than time in that is concerning. One thing though is if going to school is fine and she is learning, happy, and the school isn't forcing anything on her that you don't want her to know or do, like sex education or dissecting then I wouldn't take her out.
  • paganbaby
    October 13, 2013 at 7:47 PM

    That's the thing. She's doing so well in school right now...

    Quoting Mommynay2:

    I don't think that is selfish at all. You are the one that is working more to take control of the educational portion in her life. To want your child home with you is great, other parents want to just get rid of their child any chance they get. I respect the need for a break, but when you want to have more time off than time in that is concerning. One thing though is if going to school is fine and she is learning, happy, and the school isn't forcing anything on her that you don't want her to know or do, like sex education or dissecting then I wouldn't take her out.


  • Mommynay2
    October 13, 2013 at 10:24 PM
    I'm actually feeling the same way with my son. I see where homeschooling would help him, and especially after a three day weekend it is hard to send him to school. There's just a few things, he behaves better in school than home, not too much but at home he tantrums in school he accepts things better, with no prompting. I'll give you an example, I run things like a schedule in my house. There's a certain time to eat, sleep, play on the computer, watch tv, showers, brushing teeth and go to bed. Our dinner is supposed to be at 6 PM, now I do my best but if dinner isn't ready at 6 PM he will tantrum, until I give him to the count of three to pull it together. In school he waits patiently for anything, even attention. If I don't give him attention right when he wants it, he tantrums. I can't homeschool Destinay around him, because he interrupts and really distracts her. By the way he has Bipolar disorder and he's mildly retarded, plus he has PTSD. He's 11 years old, I can't tell you how old he is mentally. Due to the fact that there are all different parts of the brain, and he is delayed on some things but advanced on the computer and science. I want to teach him, but in school he has the highest behavior points in his class, he is learning fine, and based on his disability I would never get permission to do it. Honestly it does bother me, and I feel guilty for it. I love both of my kids evenly, but I treat them as individuals, homeschooling is a good option for Destinay but in my heart I know Thailee does better in school.


    Quoting paganbaby:

    That's the thing. She's doing so well in school right now...

    Quoting Mommynay2:

    I don't think that is selfish at all. You are the one that is working more to take control of the educational portion in her life. To want your child home with you is great, other parents want to just get rid of their child any chance they get. I respect the need for a break, but when you want to have more time off than time in that is concerning. One thing though is if going to school is fine and she is learning, happy, and the school isn't forcing anything on her that you don't want her to know or do, like sex education or dissecting then I wouldn't take her out.



  • paganbaby
    October 14, 2013 at 11:29 AM

    Funny you should say that. I have a similar problem with her older brother too. Except he did terrible in PS. At home, he listens, does his work, gets good grades, ect. The problem is, when dd is home with us and I'm trying to teach her, he's disruptive as all get out. He messes around and distracts. Next thing I know, they're either playing or fighting. I'm hoping he'll mature a bit by next year but if he doesn't, I may have to leave her there.
    Honestly it does bother me, and I feel guilty for it. I love both of my kids evenly, but I treat them as individuals, homeschooling is a good option for Destinay but in my heart I know Thailee does better in school. You said this well...

    Quoting Mommynay2:

    I'm actually feeling the same way with my son. I see where homeschooling would help him, and especially after a three day weekend it is hard to send him to school. There's just a few things, he behaves better in school than home, not too much but at home he tantrums in school he accepts things better, with no prompting. I'll give you an example, I run things like a schedule in my house. There's a certain time to eat, sleep, play on the computer, watch tv, showers, brushing teeth and go to bed. Our dinner is supposed to be at 6 PM, now I do my best but if dinner isn't ready at 6 PM he will tantrum, until I give him to the count of three to pull it together. In school he waits patiently for anything, even attention. If I don't give him attention right when he wants it, he tantrums. I can't homeschool Destinay around him, because he interrupts and really distracts her. By the way he has Bipolar disorder and he's mildly retarded, plus he has PTSD. He's 11 years old, I can't tell you how old he is mentally. Due to the fact that there are all different parts of the brain, and he is delayed on some things but advanced on the computer and science. I want to teach him, but in school he has the highest behavior points in his class, he is learning fine, and based on his disability I would never get permission to do it. Honestly it does bother me, and I feel guilty for it. I love both of my kids evenly, but I treat them as individuals, homeschooling is a good option for Destinay but in my heart I know Thailee does better in school.


    Quoting paganbaby:

    That's the thing. She's doing so well in school right now...

    Quoting Mommynay2:

    I don't think that is selfish at all. You are the one that is working more to take control of the educational portion in her life. To want your child home with you is great, other parents want to just get rid of their child any chance they get. I respect the need for a break, but when you want to have more time off than time in that is concerning. One thing though is if going to school is fine and she is learning, happy, and the school isn't forcing anything on her that you don't want her to know or do, like sex education or dissecting then I wouldn't take her out.




  • catrig
    by catrig
    October 14, 2013 at 11:31 AM
    Neither would I. I did pull a child out of a nonworking school enviroment, but only after every single issue remained unaddressed.


    Quoting AutymsMommy:

    I wouldn't pull a child out of a working school environment.


  • Mommynay2
    October 14, 2013 at 9:49 PM
    How old is your son? With Thailee I think there is some jealousy. They are very close in age. Thailee's birthday is December 14, 2001 and Destinay's birthday is December 2, 2002, their relationship can go to extremes, they are either really nice to each other or fight like cats and dogs. When their relationship is on the bad end, he dislikes any time I spend with her. When they are cool with each other, they will play and mess around. So we get nothing accomplished. I try to keep her school time distraction free no tv and only educational programs on the computer so then he gets bored, which makes a bad situation worse. Then I get bad feelings, because I feel bad that he is home from school, either for a day off, sickness or an appointment, and I'm paying more attention to Destinay, but then when we don't get anything accomplished, I feel bad for that too. I'm thankful Thailee is doing fine with school. How does your dd feel about your ds being home with you? Destinay seems patient with Thailee to an extent, but she vents to me at least once per day.


    Quoting paganbaby:

    Funny you should say that. I have a similar problem with her older brother too. Except he did terrible in PS. At home, he listens, does his work, gets good grades, ect. The problem is, when dd is home with us and I'm trying to teach her, he's disruptive as all get out. He messes around and distracts. Next thing I know, they're either playing or fighting. I'm hoping he'll mature a bit by next year but if he doesn't, I may have to leave her there.
    Honestly it does bother me, and I feel guilty for it. I love both of my
    kids evenly, but I treat them as individuals, homeschooling is a good
    option for Destinay but in my heart I know Thailee does better in
    school. You said this well...

    Quoting Mommynay2:

    I'm actually feeling the same way with my son. I see where homeschooling would help him, and especially after a three day weekend it is hard to send him to school. There's just a few things, he behaves better in school than home, not too much but at home he tantrums in school he accepts things better, with no prompting. I'll give you an example, I run things like a schedule in my house. There's a certain time to eat, sleep, play on the computer, watch tv, showers, brushing teeth and go to bed. Our dinner is supposed to be at 6 PM, now I do my best but if dinner isn't ready at 6 PM he will tantrum, until I give him to the count of three to pull it together. In school he waits patiently for anything, even attention. If I don't give him attention right when he wants it, he tantrums. I can't homeschool Destinay around him, because he interrupts and really distracts her. By the way he has Bipolar disorder and he's mildly retarded, plus he has PTSD. He's 11 years old, I can't tell you how old he is mentally. Due to the fact that there are all different parts of the brain, and he is delayed on some things but advanced on the computer and science. I want to teach him, but in school he has the highest behavior points in his class, he is learning fine, and based on his disability I would never get permission to do it. Honestly it does bother me, and I feel guilty for it. I love both of my kids evenly, but I treat them as individuals, homeschooling is a good option for Destinay but in my heart I know Thailee does better in school.





    Quoting paganbaby:

    That's the thing. She's doing so well in school right now...

    Quoting Mommynay2:

    I don't think that is selfish at all. You are the one that is working more to take control of the educational portion in her life. To want your child home with you is great, other parents want to just get rid of their child any chance they get. I respect the need for a break, but when you want to have more time off than time in that is concerning. One thing though is if going to school is fine and she is learning, happy, and the school isn't forcing anything on her that you don't want her to know or do, like sex education or dissecting then I wouldn't take her out.






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