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kirbymom
Confidence
July 20, 2013 at 8:33 PM
How do you build your confidence in yourself? What do you do?

Replies

  • Boobah
    by Boobah
    July 20, 2013 at 9:15 PM
    I've seen a couple posts about confidence lately. I guess it depends on what I need to be confident about. I educate myself about all of my decisions before making them, so that makes me confident on my parenting, school and life decisions. I don't really care one way or the other about my appearance, so I guess confidence isn't an issue. I mean, I care, and I put effort into it a little, but I don't really give it much thought as far as what others think.
  • Bleacheddecay
    July 20, 2013 at 9:59 PM

    I also research the heck of of anything I do. So, when I make a decision, I know why and I know how I'm going to do it.

  • SusanTheWriter
    July 21, 2013 at 12:39 AM

    I'm of the "fake it til you make it" school of thought. :)

    Whenever I'm facing a situation where I'm feeling less than amazing, I check my hair, put on my lipstick, stand up straight, and put a big ol' smile on my face before I walk in.

    9 times out of 10, I will find a way to get what I need out of the situation painlessly. The other time, I encounter someone so intractable they'd rebuff a saint. Their loss.

    But when I show how uncertain I am, I have a much harder time accomplishing my task, whatever it may be. People ignore me, misunderstand me, or they're abrupt and rude.

  • mommy4lyf
    July 21, 2013 at 1:02 AM
    Books, internet, blogs, support groups and actual experience.
  • KickButtMama
    July 22, 2013 at 9:20 AM

    I advise my clients, and I do it myself, to start a ME journal. Each day I have to write 1 thing good about myself - something I did great that day.....even if it was something simple like I made an awesome dinner. But I can't write anything negative (like I can't write, "I did a great job at biting my tongue and not telling everyone they stink"). Over a little while this retrains the brain to not focus so much on the negatives, and instead focuses on our triumphs - of which there are more than you think. 

  • kirbymom
    July 22, 2013 at 3:44 PM
    Just curious, do you think that your kids pick up on the way you are confident?




    Quoting Boobah:

    I've seen a couple posts about confidence lately. I guess it depends on what I need to be confident about. I educate myself about all of my decisions before making them, so that makes me confident on my parenting, school and life decisions. I don't really care one way or the other about my appearance, so I guess confidence isn't an issue. I mean, I care, and I put effort into it a little, but I don't really give it much thought as far as what others think.

  • kirbymom
    July 22, 2013 at 3:47 PM
    Is that the only way you gain confidence? Do you think that confidence is also built from a praise here or there from someone whose opinions you respect?



    Quoting Bleacheddecay:

    I also research the heck of of anything I do. So, when I make a decision, I know why and I know how I'm going to do it.


  • kirbymom
    July 22, 2013 at 3:58 PM
    I love your quote. It is very similar to one of ours....
    Fake it if you have to. :)

    Do you find that your confidence is shaken sometimes by a situation? If you do, how do you handle it?




    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    I'm of the "fake it til you make it" school of thought. :)

    Whenever I'm facing a situation where I'm feeling less than amazing, I check my hair, put on my lipstick, stand up straight, and put a big ol' smile on my face before I walk in.

    9 times out of 10, I will find a way to get what I need out of the situation painlessly. The other time, I encounter someone so intractable they'd rebuff a saint. Their loss.

    But when I show how uncertain I am, I have a much harder time accomplishing my task, whatever it may be. People ignore me, misunderstand me, or they're abrupt and rude.


  • Boobah
    by Boobah
    July 22, 2013 at 4:03 PM
    I am not sure. Do you mean are they confident because I am? My oldest is confident about some things but not about others. Something she has learned about, she will share willingly. She is too young to care about appearances, well, many kids are appearance conscious, but she isnt. Lol. She likes certain clothes, has input on her hair, etc but doesnt rely on others to tell her thry do or do not like it.
    My middle is only 4, and maybe she is.too confident. Lol


    Quoting kirbymom:

    Just curious, do you think that your kids pick up on the way you are confident?









    Quoting Boobah:

    I've seen a couple posts about confidence lately. I guess it depends on what I need to be confident about. I educate myself about all of my decisions before making them, so that makes me confident on my parenting, school and life decisions. I don't really care one way or the other about my appearance, so I guess confidence isn't an issue. I mean, I care, and I put effort into it a little, but I don't really give it much thought as far as what others think.

  • kirbymom
    July 22, 2013 at 4:03 PM
    Are you naturally confident or do you have to work for it?



    Quoting mommy4lyf:

    Books, internet, blogs, support groups and actual experience.

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