Homeschooling Moms

Featured Posts
Precious333
started to panic
July 5, 2013 at 11:53 AM
My oldest will be in secons grade next year. DH is against homeschooling still. I really feel like there is no convincing him, no matter how much our kids are learning, and how well behaved they are. We went to my nephews bday party and many of the kids there were just aweful! Two kids started picking on our son, dh didnt interfer and just watched, and our son handled it ok said DH.

Anyways, dh got a settlement from his motorcycle accident, which means we can pay off some debt, hopefully get him a car and possibly move. The deal was that unless we move to a better school district the kids will be homeschooled. So, now he wants to start looking in those areas! I started to.panic, almost started.crying and started to get so angry about it. We need to.move.to a bigger place, but I'd rather stay in our tiny place and homeschool than move and put the kids in.school. Also, i have three.kids and another on the way, i would really like a chance to homeschool each of them! Homeschooling really is where my heart is!!!

Replies

  • SusanTheWriter
    July 5, 2013 at 12:08 PM

    If you had to pick a hill to die on, would you choose homeschooling (which in your case may mean a very angry and divisive environment for your children) or your marriage and a safe and comfortable home for your family?

    There's no rule that says just because your children attend a public/private school, you can't be involved in their education, active in the school as a volunteer, and still do fun learning enrichment activities at home. Call it part-time homeschooling if you like, but there are a thousand shades of education between public and homeschool.

  • mem82
    by mem82
    July 5, 2013 at 12:17 PM

    I'm sorry, hon. Honestly, my husband and I haven't ran across any hump like this. I have no advice if you guys can't compromise. I think you guys need to spend some money on conseling. If he insists that the kids go to public school then that is going to make you too resentful. Is it the stress of living in a tiny house making him harder to get a long with?

  • Precious333
    July 5, 2013 at 12:24 PM
    No, having a good marriage is more important, and i would definitely be as involved as I can. It does sadden me so much :( i love being with my kids, I love teaching them, i love what we are doing right now! We have such a great community of homeschoolers, i am.so stressed about other stuff right now, i cant deal with the stress of school right now :(


    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    If you had to pick a hill to die on, would you choose homeschooling (which in your case may mean a very angry and divisive environment for your children) or your marriage and a safe and comfortable home for your family?

    There's no rule that says just because your children attend a public/private school, you can't be involved in their education, active in the school as a volunteer, and still do fun learning enrichment activities at home. Call it part-time homeschooling if you like, but there are a thousand shades of education between public and homeschool.


  • Precious333
    July 5, 2013 at 12:26 PM
    Yes, living in a small house is stressful.for us all, and i am trying not to be resentful. Maybe we can come up with a compromise, but we have tried to work through this before and he is unwilling to compromise with me.


    Quoting mem82:

    I'm sorry, hon. Honestly, my husband and I haven't ran across any hump like this. I have no advice if you guys can't compromise. I think you guys need to spend some money on conseling. If he insists that the kids go to public school then that is going to make you too resentful. Is it the stress of living in a tiny house making him harder to get a long with?


  • JadeTigr7
    July 5, 2013 at 12:26 PM


    I hate this argument.  This says that only giving in to her husband creates a good marriage.

    If my husband was to push me to give up homeschooling when it was something that weighed on my heart, and I felt called to do by God (which I do) then that would make for a bad marriage also.  The street runs both ways.



    OP, I am so sorry that you're having to deal with this.  My husband is completely on board with homeschooling, so I've never been through this, but I'll keep you in my prayers. 

    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    If you had to pick a hill to die on, would you choose homeschooling (which in your case may mean a very angry and divisive environment for your children) or your marriage and a safe and comfortable home for your family?

    There's no rule that says just because your children attend a public/private school, you can't be involved in their education, active in the school as a volunteer, and still do fun learning enrichment activities at home. Call it part-time homeschooling if you like, but there are a thousand shades of education between public and homeschool.



  • SusanTheWriter
    July 5, 2013 at 12:33 PM

    You can look at it as giving in. I look at it as picking a better time or finding a way that makes both parties happy.

    I also don't look at homeschooling as the only possibility in a world filled with options.

    Quoting JadeTigr7:


    I hate this argument.  This says that only giving in to her husband creates a good marriage.

    If my husband was to push me to give up homeschooling when it was something that weighed on my heart, and I felt called to do by God (which I do) then that would make for a bad marriage also.  The street runs both ways.



    OP, I am so sorry that you're having to deal with this.  My husband is completely on board with homeschooling, so I've never been through this, but I'll keep you in my prayers. 

    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    If you had to pick a hill to die on, would you choose homeschooling (which in your case may mean a very angry and divisive environment for your children) or your marriage and a safe and comfortable home for your family?

    There's no rule that says just because your children attend a public/private school, you can't be involved in their education, active in the school as a volunteer, and still do fun learning enrichment activities at home. Call it part-time homeschooling if you like, but there are a thousand shades of education between public and homeschool.




  • JadeTigr7
    July 5, 2013 at 12:40 PM

    Sometimes homeschooling is the better option.

    If someone is called by God to homeschool, but doesn't follow that, then they won't be very happy.

    Just trying to point out that sometimes, just giving in and being involved in public school doesn't always make people happy either. The way you worded your response was that the only way to keep her marriage happy was by giving up what she feels called to do.  I don't see how exactly that solves anything.  If she didn't care about her kids being in school she wouldn't have panicked about it.  Maybe its not a big deal to YOU, but to some people, it is and that doesn't make it any less valid. 


    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    You can look at it as giving in. I look at it as picking a better time or finding a way that makes both parties happy.

    I also don't look at homeschooling as the only possibility in a world filled with options.

    Quoting JadeTigr7:


    I hate this argument.  This says that only giving in to her husband creates a good marriage.

    If my husband was to push me to give up homeschooling when it was something that weighed on my heart, and I felt called to do by God (which I do) then that would make for a bad marriage also.  The street runs both ways.



    OP, I am so sorry that you're having to deal with this.  My husband is completely on board with homeschooling, so I've never been through this, but I'll keep you in my prayers. 

    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    If you had to pick a hill to die on, would you choose homeschooling (which in your case may mean a very angry and divisive environment for your children) or your marriage and a safe and comfortable home for your family?

    There's no rule that says just because your children attend a public/private school, you can't be involved in their education, active in the school as a volunteer, and still do fun learning enrichment activities at home. Call it part-time homeschooling if you like, but there are a thousand shades of education between public and homeschool.






  • SusanTheWriter
    July 5, 2013 at 12:47 PM

    You may be right. I'm just saying that there's a very big scope to education, to marriage and to life. Balance is tricky to find, but choosing one thing over everything else often doesn't make anyone happy.

    Quoting JadeTigr7:

    Sometimes homeschooling is the better option.

    If someone is called by God to homeschool, but doesn't follow that, then they won't be very happy.

    Just trying to point out that sometimes, just giving in and being involved in public school doesn't always make people happy either. The way you worded your response was that the only way to keep her marriage happy was by giving up what she feels called to do.  I don't see how exactly that solves anything.  If she didn't care about her kids being in school she wouldn't have panicked about it.  Maybe its not a big deal to YOU, but to some people, it is and that doesn't make it any less valid. 


    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    You can look at it as giving in. I look at it as picking a better time or finding a way that makes both parties happy.

    I also don't look at homeschooling as the only possibility in a world filled with options.

    Quoting JadeTigr7:


    I hate this argument.  This says that only giving in to her husband creates a good marriage.

    If my husband was to push me to give up homeschooling when it was something that weighed on my heart, and I felt called to do by God (which I do) then that would make for a bad marriage also.  The street runs both ways.



    OP, I am so sorry that you're having to deal with this.  My husband is completely on board with homeschooling, so I've never been through this, but I'll keep you in my prayers. 

    Quoting SusanTheWriter:

    If you had to pick a hill to die on, would you choose homeschooling (which in your case may mean a very angry and divisive environment for your children) or your marriage and a safe and comfortable home for your family?

    There's no rule that says just because your children attend a public/private school, you can't be involved in their education, active in the school as a volunteer, and still do fun learning enrichment activities at home. Call it part-time homeschooling if you like, but there are a thousand shades of education between public and homeschool.







  • Boobah
    by Boobah
    July 5, 2013 at 1:33 PM
    Have you asked your dh why he is against homeschooling? What are his reasons? If they are valid, maybe you should consider giving up homeschooling. If they are ridiculous like socialization, etc, then you may have to stand your ground and tell him why it is so important to you. Give him examples, facts, read him excerpts from well written homeschooling books or websites.
    You say you have a good HS community, that is so great! Have you talked with them? Has dh spent time with them as well? Once my husband went to a homeschool convention with me he was sold.
  • usmom3
    by usmom3
    BJ
    July 5, 2013 at 1:53 PM

     I am so sorry that you are in this situation. I wish that your Hubby could see it through your eyes & understand why it is so important to you.

Homeschooling Moms

Active Posts in All Groups
More Active Posts
Today's “Featured” Posts
More Featured Posts