Homeschooling Moms

Bluecalm
I don't WANT him to socialize with most kids
June 22, 2013 at 9:55 AM

Every single person I have mentioned homeschooling to thinks it's terrible that my child won't be able to socialize. I think they are clueless about what alot of kids are like. We swim at the Y in the summer. The first day some boys his age were playing and screamed at him he couldn't play with them. He hadn't even gone near them much less asked to play. The next day some kids were playing a game asking each other what they liked. One was,"Do you like beer?' Yesterday a girl about 6 told a boy she wanted to have his baby. So who are all these kids that my son would beneift from socializing with?

Replies

  • TJandKarasMom
    June 22, 2013 at 9:59 AM

    I feel the same way.  I really think a lot of people that question "socializing" are just trying to find a reason why the 'different' choice you make is 'bad' and why their 'normal' choice is 'good.'  It's just deflecting really.  It doesn't make is easy for us to answer to it, though.

    I don't want my kids around other 'socialized' kids either, I would rather have them grow up with different kinds of people that are accepting and considerate of others.  I hope to find those kids in our homeschooling journey :)

  • AJ-47
    by AJ-47
    June 22, 2013 at 10:09 AM
    I agree. So many kids these days are just awful. I still take my Son out and let Him "make friends" (as He calls it, hehe), but if I hear anything I don't like (so far, I have not), I will say something to that child, or We'd leave if it got bad enough.
    What you heard made my jaw drop. You certainly wouldn't hear that from my Son! He knows better than to even think about adult things like those.
  • mommy4lyf
    June 22, 2013 at 10:25 AM

    I agree with you. 

  • swim-mom72
    June 22, 2013 at 11:05 AM

    I don't think we, as homeschoolers, should generalize. Because that is what public school supporters do to us. What I mean, is that I have seen good and bad behavior from homescool AND public school kids. The difference is not necessarily in how we educate our kids, but in how we parent them : )

  • Bluecalm
    June 22, 2013 at 11:45 AM
    I don't mean they're bad, it's just what they are exposed to. All it takes is one kid in a class who is very wordly and then your kid knows those things too.
  • Bleacheddecay
    June 22, 2013 at 11:49 AM

    Sadly a lot of homeschooled kids don't behave that much better. I kept hoping they'd be smarter and less superficial but all too often the do the same ridiculous, stupid things. Over all they do tend to be more inclusive at least.

  • Knightquester
    June 22, 2013 at 12:20 PM

    I don't think I could have worded it better.

    To give an example I have seen public schooled children make fun of and try to ostracize a particular kid, and sadly in our homeschool group I watched it happen.  The parents in both cases could care less and thought it was just part of life.

    Quoting swim-mom72:

    I don't think we, as homeschoolers, should generalize. Because that is what public school supporters do to us. What I mean, is that I have seen good and bad behavior from homescool AND public school kids. The difference is not necessarily in how we educate our kids, but in how we parent them : )



  • lucsch
    by lucsch
    June 22, 2013 at 2:14 PM

    I agree! I am very particular about playdates and groups we attend. I don't want my dd exposed to sex and porn, drugs, alcohol, cursing, and who knows what else. 

  • lucsch
    by lucsch
    June 22, 2013 at 2:23 PM

    Oh, yes, I agree it is the parenting.

    My sons went to public school--a really good one. Still, they heard cursing on a daily basis.

    My dh works at a public school. That's one of the reasons he supports me homeschooling our daughter. Bad parenting = kids who influence other kids in a bad way. He sees it.

    There are a lot of homeschoolers here. I've not met a disrespectful homeschooled kid, yet. I am not saying they are not out there. On the other hand, all of my sons' public schooled friends are always very respectful and polite when they are visiting our house. So, yes, a blanket statement isn't going to work, but I feel one is more likely to find uncaring parents in a public schooling setting over a homeschooling situation. Homeschooling, done right, has to come from a caring and dedicated parent.


    Quoting swim-mom72:

    I don't think we, as homeschoolers, should generalize. Because that is what public school supporters do to us. What I mean, is that I have seen good and bad behavior from homescool AND public school kids. The difference is not necessarily in how we educate our kids, but in how we parent them : )



  • jen2150
    by jen2150
    June 22, 2013 at 2:35 PM

    Honestly you can't keep your child from bad influences or bad behavior.   The beauty of homeschooling if we get to pick and choose what our children are exposed and make sure they are ready to handle any new experiences.  I think in homeschooing we can go overboard with keeping our children from bad influences.  There is no way unless you stay home and filter everything coming in.  My son learned about cursing by just hearing people while in public.  I simply explained what he heard and that we don't use those words and why.  I have met some awesome kids in public school.  It depends on where you go.  While it is true it only takes one child to say something, we can't let one child we may or not meet limit who our children come in contact with.  i have taught my children right and wrong and not to tolerate any bad behavior from others.  They have had bad encounters with other and have handled them very well.  Handling negative things is a part of life.  I also would never generalize about large groups.

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