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tiredmomfor2
How do you deal with your kids arguing?
April 6, 2013 at 11:17 AM
My two oldest 7 and 5 have gotten into the habit of yelling at each other over everything.
Even just a simple question that one has for another and they are yelling. I do not talk to them like that and neither does their father. Sure I yell from time to time, but not all day constantly.
I am honestly at a loss of how to deal with it at this point. They just automatically go from silent to arguing in two seconds flat. over nothing. It isn't even a disagreement or anything I can mediate it is just yelling.
They have also had just bad attitudes in general the last few weeks. Not sure what the problem is at this point. I was sick (had a surgery with some complications) but I am better now. Maybe it is them being stressed from that? Our routine was all thrown off...but it is mostly back in place now. I'm really not sure.
Any tips for breaking the yelling habit in my kids?
Have you dealt with this before?

Replies

  • usmom3
    by usmom3
    BJ
    April 6, 2013 at 1:23 PM
    Usually when my younger kids (ages 7 & 9) get like that it is because things are out of balance, be it them feeding off of my stress, or them not feeling well, tiered, hungry, thirsty, feeling like their needs are not getting meet. When I begin to address those things & help them fix those things they begin to have better control of their responses to each other. Another thing I have learned is very crucially important is for me to set the example of controlling myself in those moments that I would normally lose it & yell. If I can keep it together they learn how to from my example.
  • Dawn07
    by Dawn07
    April 6, 2013 at 5:33 PM
    Duct tape! Jk, I'm kinda in the same boat except mine is six and almost two. I haven't figured it out either, which is making the duct tape even more appealing.
  • debramommyof4
    April 6, 2013 at 5:44 PM

     When my kids get like that I seperate them.  They go to thier rooms and rest.  When they get up we go spend the day outside running and playing.  They ussually get better.

  • bluerooffarm
    April 6, 2013 at 10:22 PM

     I may be the strange one here.  I try to figure out the underlying cause, but when tey are constantly bickering and fighting I will put them in an oersize shirt and make them stay in it together for a while.  They have to learnto cooperate so that they can eat, was their hands, whatever. 

    Last thing is the whisper rule.  If they yell in the house, they are required t whisper for the next hour to make up for it.  They really like that!

  • tiredmomfor2
    April 6, 2013 at 10:27 PM
    I actually love these ideas Blue!
    I struggle sometimes to try to decide if they need to have time apart, or if they just need to learn how to get along.
    oh and I may try the whispering rule. I have stopped trying to even stop them when they get to yelling. I do make them stop but me yelling along with them is not helping the situtaion. We in general have a very loud house..but the recent yelling has been unacceptable.


    Quoting bluerooffarm:

     I may be the strange one here.  I try to figure out the underlying cause, but when tey are constantly bickering and fighting I will put them in an oersize shirt and make them stay in it together for a while.  They have to learnto cooperate so that they can eat, was their hands, whatever. 


    Last thing is the whisper rule.  If they yell in the house, they are required t whisper for the next hour to make up for it.  They really like that!


  • tiredmomfor2
    April 6, 2013 at 10:29 PM
    Duct tape does sound nice! Lol


    Quoting Dawn07:

    Duct tape! Jk, I'm kinda in the same boat except mine is six and almost two. I haven't figured it out either, which is making the duct tape even more appealing.

  • bluerooffarm
    April 7, 2013 at 10:56 AM

     I'm glad you like the ideas.  Sorry about all those typos!  It was obviously time to clean the keyboard!  LOL

    We have a very loud house too.  I've found they listen much better when I whisper to them than when I yell (and I am a yeller!!).   One day they yelled so loudly that the walls rang.  So I said that the walls needed a break.  We whispered for about an hour, the boys loved it!  It went from yelling and bickering to whispering and giggling in an instant!

    Quoting tiredmomfor2:

    I actually love these ideas Blue!
    I struggle sometimes to try to decide if they need to have time apart, or if they just need to learn how to get along.
    oh and I may try the whispering rule. I have stopped trying to even stop them when they get to yelling. I do make them stop but me yelling along with them is not helping the situtaion. We in general have a very loud house..but the recent yelling has been unacceptable.


    Quoting bluerooffarm:

     I may be the strange one here.  I try to figure out the underlying cause, but when tey are constantly bickering and fighting I will put them in an oersize shirt and make them stay in it together for a while.  They have to learnto cooperate so that they can eat, was their hands, whatever. 


    Last thing is the whisper rule.  If they yell in the house, they are required t whisper for the next hour to make up for it.  They really like that!


     

  • mommy4lyf
    April 7, 2013 at 12:58 PM

     

    I only have one child but, if I have another one which is impossible now...I will apply your style.

    Quoting bluerooffarm:

     I may be the strange one here.  I try to figure out the underlying cause, but when tey are constantly bickering and fighting I will put them in an oersize shirt and make them stay in it together for a while.  They have to learnto cooperate so that they can eat, was their hands, whatever. 

    Last thing is the whisper rule.  If they yell in the house, they are required t whisper for the next hour to make up for it.  They really like that!


     

  • mem82
    by mem82
    April 7, 2013 at 3:31 PM

    I get a water bottle and spray them. LOL Or maybe I just imagine doing that.

    I usually just take the toy, tv, snack, whatever it is. They learn pretty quick not to get loud enough to bring Mom to the situation or no one wins.

  • oredeb
    by oredeb
    April 8, 2013 at 10:58 AM

     ive dealt with it, the kids gotta pay up if they are arguing or yelling at each other, 25 cents every time it happens, and if its the girls arguing they get to share a bedroom together, this worked with my oldest dd and youngest dd, they are best friends now!

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