Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Cafe Steph
What has been the most unexpected thing about parenting a child with autism?
June 27, 2013 at 11:26 AM

What has been the most unexpected thing about parenting a child with autism?

Replies

  • Momof4AEMW
    June 27, 2013 at 12:25 PM

    That I can say I have a non-verbal, hearing impaired, severely developmentally delayed down syndrome daughter with a gamete of medical needs, and it is not even on our radar as the difficult part of our daily life.  The Autism that affects my son in our daily lives is more demanding and harder to manage on a regular basis.  I am not pitting one child against the other, nor one disability over another, I'm saying for our family, the daily complications of one compared to the other, the Autism is more difficult to manage.  Either of their medical issues will always trump the developmental delay concerns for us.  But the restrictions that come to our life with my autistic son's sensory issues, screaming behaviors, inability to transition/change, or be in public is what dictates what our family is able to do and how we can function.  It is also the issue we seem to be unable to find best how to help him with regardless of all the therapies and diet changes he tries.  I have no problem that my son is autistic.  I just want him to be the happiest he can be with what he was given, and I can not say we are there yet for him.  But he is an amazing kid, and we'll find it somehow.

  • JennaPBug
    June 27, 2013 at 1:28 PM

    That my DH wouldn't be on the same page as me. He wants whats best for our boy but has been so persistently against calling him Autistic and that he needs more therapy.

  • kajira
    by kajira
    June 27, 2013 at 1:56 PM

    As an autistic adult, the most difficult part of raising children is being able to tell what's a "normal" behavior and what was autistic-like or related to another behavior. I'm not totally sure what's normal, and growing up, none of my friends were usually neurotypical. as an adult, I tend to gravitate more towards social loners and have quality, rather than quantity for friendship. This makes me less sure of what is "normal" and "acceptable" and "something I should take note of."

    I often remarked on behaviors as being quirky that were actually normal. LOL And things that were extremely quirky in my son - I didn't think anything of.... so having one normal developing child and one special needs child has been incredibly useful that way for me, I can kind of see how she interacts, talks, expresses her emotions, relates to the world around her, and it really gives me a lot of clues on where I'm "different" and where my special needs child is. 

    Just understanding what seperates normal and not normal has been the biggest challenge for me, but that's because I'm autistic too.

  • Jenn8604
    June 27, 2013 at 2:01 PM
    That even tho it is challenging it has its rewards. and that Id get to know so many awesome moms on here who have great advice.
  • JTMOM422
    June 27, 2013 at 2:42 PM

    Learning to schedule and juggle all the appointments for my son. Trying to work time in for just my dd and still taking care of appointments for me and her. Plus 2 cats and a dog. Trying to get everything done around therapies. Even housework has to be split up throughout the day so we can go to therapies. 

  • girl_incognito
    June 27, 2013 at 3:09 PM

    Right on!

    for me the most unexpected thing was finding out I was autistic just like my son!  LOL

    Quoting kajira:

    As an autistic adult, the most difficult part of raising children is being able to tell what's a "normal" behavior and what was autistic-like or related to another behavior. I'm not totally sure what's normal, and growing up, none of my friends were usually neurotypical. as an adult, I tend to gravitate more towards social loners and have quality, rather than quantity for friendship. This makes me less sure of what is "normal" and "acceptable" and "something I should take note of."

    I often remarked on behaviors as being quirky that were actually normal. LOL And things that were extremely quirky in my son - I didn't think anything of.... so having one normal developing child and one special needs child has been incredibly useful that way for me, I can kind of see how she interacts, talks, expresses her emotions, relates to the world around her, and it really gives me a lot of clues on where I'm "different" and where my special needs child is. 

    Just understanding what seperates normal and not normal has been the biggest challenge for me, but that's because I'm autistic too.


  • amonkeymom
    Amy
    June 27, 2013 at 3:13 PM

    Learning differences between kids on the spectrum and those who are "NT" and that they aren't really all that "different".  

    Becoming more empathetic toward others.

  • SAMI_JO
    by SAMI_JO
    June 27, 2013 at 8:48 PM

     How  violent he can be. He kicked me in the back of the head this evening, and has NO remorse. Just more anger because I won't let him have company or go anywhere for the next 9 days.

  • Jenibob
    by Jenibob
    June 27, 2013 at 8:56 PM

    The progress my son makes.  Learning his interests/likes and watching him succeed in those endeavors. He is in there!:)   The kind nature and sweet disposition he holds. 

  • Jewelrymom236
    June 27, 2013 at 9:15 PM
    The unending questions..........about everything. OMG I mean I'm glad she's asking and glad she's bright but sometimes I have to tell her (DD 7)
    that's she had her quota questions for the morning. Some of them I can't even answer , like the medical and the science ones. I tell her, she has to ask her Father.

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