Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

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MamaGlitterBug
Frustrated with school (PIOG)
October 14, 2012 at 5:07 PM

About to have WW3 with either Isaac's teacher or his aides! I'm beyond sick and tired of my son getting "marked" as "fair or "cans do better" in other classes, because they claim he is being stubborn! He is starting the Mainstreaming process this year. The mainstream teacher has told me herself he participates as much as he can, raises his hand, and tries really hard but may need his work modified". I've told them all that he says the work is tricky or that he doesn't understand it. And every day almost they write "he was stubborn today". Now I know my son CAN be stubborn, but there's a difference in being stubborn and not understanding the work. So today's reply to their daily "stubborn note" is as follows:
"Let's get this straight, stubborn by definition is being unreasonable, unyielding, and refusing to complete his work. Understanding by definition is the mental process of comprehension. I've repeatedly told y'all he has said numerous times he does not understand the work. There's a difference in being stubborn and not understanding. What methods are you and your staff using to help him better understand the work? If those methods aren't working, we need to try other methods!" 

I've already scheduled a conference with his new teacher that starts after Fall Break. On MONDAY we were informed his current teacher was not returning (going back to school for psychology I think), and I am going to nip this crap out NOW! 

He is already showing behavior and apprehension about a new teacher. This is a HUGE change and he needs transitional time to adjust to that news as well!

Replies

  • Hottubgodess
    October 14, 2012 at 6:38 PM

    You need an ER IEP meeting NOW!!!

    If I had a dollar for every time I heard "manipulative and defiant" I would be a rich woman.  It is called "teacher cant teach to different child or recognize differnt child is struggling".  Stubbornness needs to be a sign he needs help.  Mine spent a lot of time in the hall or office last year due to teachers not having a clue.  

    So ask very softly "why isnt he doing the work?".  If they say it doesnt matter, remind them it does.  :)  His motivation is very important.  If he is confused, he cant say.  So if he is "refusing", they need to ask why.  

  • MomOfOneCoolKid
    October 14, 2012 at 7:12 PM

    Ugh. Do you have a developmental pediatrician who can work with you advocate for your son?

  • Leobaby2007
    October 15, 2012 at 5:35 AM
    Mama, have you been to see Dr. Melmed? We're going at the end of the month for our second visit with him. Perhaps he might have suggestions? After all, he is the autism expert in the area where we live....whatever that means lol. (eye roll)

    See- I hated our school district when Donovan was in it for the same kinds of reasons you are describing. Why aren't they better equipped to deal with this stuff? Ugh!!!!!! (((HUGS)))
  • MamaGlitterBug
    October 15, 2012 at 3:21 PM
    He is followed by Dev ped and they ignore everything he has tried to tell them before.

    It's so ridiculous. He gets a new teacher next Monday and I'm having a meeting with her.
  • Rachelle11503
    October 15, 2012 at 4:28 PM

    Ugh, I totally understand!! Last year my daughter got traumatized because the teacher sent her to the prinicipal's office for not doing her work...the principal proceeded to keep her in there for an hour telling her to do her work. Not once did anyone offer to explain it! They thought she was being defiant...my poor girl was in tears and she hates showing any emotion so that was a big deal. To this day if you ask her her least favorite grade it was last year because of that one event.
    Good for you for speaking up for your child!! I wish I would have done it sooner

  • MamaGlitterBug
    October 26, 2012 at 7:18 PM

    UPDATE:

    THIS TEACHER IS MUCH BETTER, AND ON BOARD WITH EVERYTHING. REMOVED THE AIDE WORKING WITH HIM IN MATH AND PUT ANOTHER AIDE HE IS MORE FAMILIAR WITH AND SURPRISE, ISSUES ARE GONE WITH THAT ISSUE AND SHE SAID SHE IS GIVING HIM PLENTY OF TIME TO ADJUST TO ALL THESE CHANGES

  • MomOfOneCoolKid
    October 26, 2012 at 8:41 PM


    Quoting MamaGlitterBug:

    UPDATE:

    THIS TEACHER IS MUCH BETTER, AND ON BOARD WITH EVERYTHING. REMOVED THE AIDE WORKING WITH HIM IN MATH AND PUT ANOTHER AIDE HE IS MORE FAMILIAR WITH AND SURPRISE, ISSUES ARE GONE WITH THAT ISSUE AND SHE SAID SHE IS GIVING HIM PLENTY OF TIME TO ADJUST TO ALL THESE CHANGES


    woohoo

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