Love & Marriage
Hi,
I'll try to make this short. I was in a happy marriage (or so I thought) to this wonderful Man that loved me more than himself (or so I thought) we bought a house, I finally got pregnant after trying for 2 yrs, life was good...until at 8 months pregnant and only 1 week in our new house I received a call that distoyed everything I had, he was cheating on me. For 3 years we tried, or I did...it didnt work, we got divorced. Since then I did not trust anyone so dating was not in my books.
One day I met this guy who did anything possible to take me on a date, I have no idea how many times I turned him down.I finally went and long story short we have been together for 1.5 yrs. Its been great, He is wonderful and treats me like a Queen. He is 13 yrs younger than me, He looks older and really acts older than he is, even his interests. I look younger than I am, and I have a young spirit so I guess we meet in the middle.
I feel that my ex Husband took away a lot from me, even the dream of having 2 children. Now I am 47, would love to have another baby, but I feel its too late, physicaly I still can but society sees it as bad and also the fact that my BF is younger than me is a factor in society.
So my question is, would you give it a try? do you care about society?
Replies
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Society does not pay your bills, is not in your relationship, and it's none of society's business how you live your life. Don't let other people determine the path you want to take in life. If you're a good person and just want to be happy, do exactly what you want...
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Honestly I find a bit late to have a baby I say only because of health issues. Everything else is really on you if your comfortable with it. -
I would not try. It's not about society. At 47, odds are, your body is likely beyond the stage of having kids.
Most importantly, I don't believe it's fair to any child you would have at your age. My dad was 44 when I was born & 46 when my brother was born. He's amazing. He's my very favorite person. I'm only 28 & my brother is only 26. Our dad is 72. He's already had two heart attacks & bypass surgery. His parents & older passed away in their 80's. 10 years is likely what we have left with him. The last 10 years of his life. He doesn't hear well, so he misses out on so much of what my kids have to say. I have an older sister who is 50 & an older brother who is 42 (different moms). Their kids are grown or nearly grown. They will have had my dad soooo much longer than my younger brother & me. Their kids will have so many more memories with my dad than my kids will.
Would you be a bad mom? No. Would you be leaving your child too soon? Yes. Would be active in your grandchildren's lives? Maybe, but not for long.
Look into foster care. Or adoption of an older child who needs a forever home. -
My grandmother was thirteen yrs older than my grandpa. If it was acceptable then, I don't see why not now. They were married for over fifty years before " death they did part" but only briefly as my grandmother passed of what some call a broken heart. -
Go for it! Don't worry about society!!! -
Be happy. I that means another baby and you are able to provide for that baby's needs (not just financial) do it. Society is only in control of your life if you allow it. -
My mom had my little sister at 42 and It's so hard for her to keep up with her than when she was in her 20's with me and my sister. She has arthritis in her hands and It's just harder all around for her. My mom turns 54 this year and is realizing her sisters being able to enjoy being a grandma where as she still has to take care of my sister for 6 more years. She loves my little sister but I don't think she realized just how hard it was going to be.
You are free to do as you choose and don't listen to people telling you not to have a kid. I honestly would adopt or foster an older child who needed a good home, but that's just me. -
At that age probably not, just bc I would be getting up in age before the child were an adult. Probably miss out on alot. If you want to go for it who cares what society thinks!
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I appreciate all the replies, I need to mention also that my Daughter is 6 yrs old so I am not really done yet...
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this. i think if you found a doctor that would monitor you properly during pregnancy and you had no underlying health issues you could probably have a safe/healthy pregnancy but it seems a litttle late. how does your man feel about it? (i don't think age should prevent anyone from doing wha they want)
Quoting 2lilmamas:
Honestly I find a bit late to have a baby I say only because of health issues. Everything else is really on you if your comfortable with it.