I just wanted to thank those of you who offered their advice and support, we worked things out last night. For those of you that had nothing but negative things to say: IN YO FACE!!! You were wrong.
A few days ago, my husband asked me what an emotional affair was because it came up in conversation, I explained the best I could; I said it's when you connect on an emotional level with someone other than your spouse and it can lead to a physical affair.
Deapite our conversation, he reestablished contact with an old friend that he had strong feelings for. Her name is Rachelle, she lives somewhere near Pittsburgh, and they met online before him and I met, but they never met in person.
She felt it was ok for her to date and tell him about her sexual exploits, but she got angry when he told her about our relationship and quit talking to him for a while.
Some time after she started talking to him again, I found an inappropriate conversation between them. She tried to influence him to break up with me when he was having doubts about our relationship. She got mad again when he told her we worked it out and stopped talking to him again until now.
He had a girlfriend for 8 years and she treated him pretty badly before cheating on him, dumping him, and getting with the guy she cheated on him with. He said this woman that he's talking to was the first person he cared about after the breakup. He was in one other brief relationship before we met and we took things slow, started as friends, neither one of us imagined that we would be married a year after we met and have a son and another baby on the way.
Yes, he has an emotional relationship with her. If it is taking energy away from your relationship, then he needs to break it off. The real question is, what is he getting from it that he needs to continue it?
Grow up! There will be in tyour future many emotional connections you will not like or approve of. Men coming home from war have a bond with their buddies that you will not understand. It is part of being human. Either seek enlightment and a course in reality of be miserable. Your choice.
I am glad you worked it out. I hope that he has chosen to stop talking to her. Any woman who actively tries to interfere with your relationship should be removed from your contact lists. My DH had an ex online GF try this early on in our relationship. She put a lot of doubts in his head & he very nearly broke up with me in favor of her. Til his BFF got wind of what was happening & had a long serious talk about his feelings towards me & the other girl. I owe his BFF big, she got him to see that it was me he truly loved & wanted to be with. And he told the other girl he was done, broke off all communication with her that day & hasn't spoken to her since. That was nearly 4 years ago. Since you two have a life & children together, I would very much encourage him to back away from this person & tell her to move along.