This hasnt applied to us in a few years, but when were were younger and first starting out, hell yeah it did.
We met at 19 and were married at 19. There was still quite a bit of growing up and growing together that needed to be done.
OK so onto the curfew.
I have always had 100% trust in dh, he has never given me a reason not to (still hasnt 7 years later). So when he would go out with his "boys" a few nights a week I didnt care where he was or who he was with. I just had 1 rule. Be respectful of your wife and new mother and come home at a decent hour. No more partying all night and walking in the door at 9am the next day still drunk from the night before.
My curfew was 12
or 1am on a weekday and no later then 3am on a weekend. And dh - even
though he messed up once or twice - for the most part respected this.
After we grew up a little and grew together, the friends and "chilling"
in the streets and getting drunk lost their appeal for him. Now 7 years
later dh wouldnt dare come home after 10pm unless he was working a late
job. Is just something that you dont do. He has a family and coming home
late is just disrespectful. Plus we are married, we dont go out as
single people any more. We never really did in the first place. He only
started after we had the baby, I needed to be home. Now that the "baby"
is 5, we are back to being partners in crime together, but not just us,
as a family.
So one of my newly married girlfriends is having a similar problem with her new dh. They do not have kids yet, but they have been married for about a year. She said it was fine in the beginning but no matter how much she bitches he still wont come home at a decent hour. Mind you they are our age now - late 20's. I told her that I gave my dh a curfew when we first got married and had the baby. (Before our ds, Dh never went any where with out me, if he was out partying all night i was right along side him. We were partners in crime, until I had ds, then I was home and dh took a little time to get out of his chilling phase.) And it worked for us. She looked at me like I was nuts. And said she could never put rules on her husband like that.
I think 1am on a week day/3am on a weekend is reasonable and hardly asking too much of a husband. (yes yes, you shouldnt have to do this if they are your dh they should already know and respect, blah blah blah.. All men, especially when your married young need a bit of training. You grow together as a couple - so all of "you" can shove it - "you" know who "you" are)
Have you ever? or Would you ever put a curfew on your dh if he was one to stay out late?
January 22, 2013 at 12:28 AM
We never have had "curfews", really. We just know that the other is at home waiting, so we don't try to be out late if we're out on our own. He works nights, so he isn't home til midnight (sometimes 1 am if he has to give the dishwashers a ride home). I rarely go out, so I never have that issue. Idk... just never applied to us. We're always together unless he's at work or I go somewhere with my mom/mil.