It's one of the most common causes for marital strife and one of the most common reasons that couples separate. It's not always an easy subject to broach -- a lot of people have differing spending habits, different ways to handle money, and sometimes, those differences can't be easily solved.
Here are some tips for handling money in a relationship:
1) Don't make the money talk into a big production. While one partner may spend while the other is a saver, it's important that you're both open and honest about the way you handle the finances.
2) Come up with some mutually agreed upon reasonable guidelines for ways to handle money. It can be as simple as running purchases over X dollars by your partner BEFORE spending it.
3) Come up with some reasonable goals for your life -- saving for college, trips, and how to keep on top of all the holiday spending so you're not constantly dipping into savings.
4) Set up a savings account, and each week, put five dollars in there. It sounds like chump change, but it can add up over time.
5) Decide whether or not you should have mutual bank accounts or separate ones. This can be a huge help for couples who have different ways of handling money.
6) Begin to track your spending before putting together a budget. Each day, write down how much you've spent and on what using a shared spreadsheet. This can help you identify things you're overspending on and ways you can make the budget work.
7) Create a realistic budget that actually works for you. It may appear that the weekly Starbucks runs are indulgent, but perhaps this is how your partner blows off steam and gets away from work for awhile.
8) Set aside some money as "fun money" for the month. Use it to do dinner out, see a movie, or buy something for the house. You don't want to feel guilty for having fun -- just make sure that it's within the budget.
9) Have weekly meetings about the budget and make them fun, not super serious and scary. In those meetings (maybe make some popcorn?), make sure you check in with each other as to how you're both handling the budget, if it's working, and plot out any upcoming bills.
10) Work together to make sure your finances are under control and that you're both on the same page with the money stuff. It's awkward to talk about at first, especially if you're not accustomed to it, but remember that you're a team -- you can do this.
Any other advice for handling money in a marriage?
by furbabymumDecember 27, 2012 at 10:49 AM
Don't put the money in the hands of the least responsible party with money. lol My DH is just better with it than I am. I wouldn't drive us to bankruptcy or anything but I wouldn't have us in the spot we are at. So for the most part I trust his judgments completely. Only time I interject is when he gets unrealistic with how much money it really takes to feed us all and such.
Unfortunately I have no advice for handling money in a marriage. That is been our biggest fights. I am a saver and he is a compulsive spender. We have tried spreadsheets, tracking money, and I even sat him down and talked to him like he is 10 yrs old. It is still an issue and we have been married for 11 yrs. He has almost driven us to bankruptcy.
by pittymamaDecember 27, 2012 at 4:28 PM
we try to keep an open line of communication about money. for the most part, he makes it and i keep track of where it needs to go because he's really bad at it. he's been getting better though and we've been able to talk openly for a while about money.
December 27, 2012 at 4:36 PM
We have an agreement where if it's over $100 bucks, we have to let the other person know before buying it. That way we can discuss it. We have a savings and our joint on all our accounts, even if we didn't have joint accounts I have his POA for life lol. We don't buy something huge unless we really need it, like furniture or a vehicle.
Well, we work hard to avoid them. We do all of the things on this list. We also do not borrow money or use credit cards. If we don't cash for it, we do not spend it.
Also, we pray about it. Before we start working on the monthly budget, we pray for guidance how we can best put the blessings we are given to use. I know that many people will scoff at this, but ever since we started, we have been able to make our money go farther than it did before.
by Hottmomma607December 28, 2012 at 1:22 AMWe never fight about money!
December 29, 2012 at 1:39 AM
RUN, lol...j/k... I let hubby take care of the finances since he is the one working. We don't argue.