Love & Marriage
I'm curious as to what 'rule(s)' you and your Husband set when you got married.
Ours is:
NEVER say you want a divorce no matter how mad you are unless you mean it.
Replies
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No rules here. We respect each other enough to not need rules to keep each other in line. We know what's wrong and not. Dont need rules to state the obvious. -
no matter how mad we are we always say "i love you". that is really the only one we have.
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We don't have "rules", I guess just common sense. It's worked for over 20 years.
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We were together for 8 years before we got married. "Rules" were already established well before the wedding day. Hahaha
I think that is an unspoken rule of ours. I would say for us that was just a given. Plus how bad would things have to be to even utter those words. Shit would HAVE to already be pretty bad before that was even mentioned anyways. -
We have that one to. Never say you want to get a divorce. Be open with eachother. -
We also have Never Say Divorce...
We also don't spend over $100 on something unexpected without discussing it with the other. This has saved each of us from making impulse purchases that we would have regretted. He doens't just go out and buy a new computer, and I don't just go out and sign up for things from door to door salesmen without being able to research them first. True story... I was so glad I didn't just buy it, because I can buy them 1/3 of the price online.
Items that are typically over that amount are budgeted for. I.e. groceries, new clothes for kids, birthday and Christmas giftsWe also don't cultivate friendships with members of the opposite sex away from each other. Meaning I don't go hang out with one of our guy friends at a coffee shop. This helps us stay "affair proof".
We have sex every week... meaning at least 1 time in a 7 day period, unless there's a serious medical reason not to. Usually it's more often than that, but that's my promise to him. Arguments, schedules, and other bothersome things just have to be worked through and not left to fester.
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My main rule is, "If you cheat on me, I will kill you".
Also, 100% honesty is expected.
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We don't have rules but we agreed to no name calling, never using the word divorce and other things we both felt makes for a happy and healthy marriage but I'm not sure if I would call them rules.
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Mutual Respect is the biggest. Communication,no matter how hard a topic. Choose your words carefully in an argument-you can't take back things said in anger,so you better mean what you say when you say them.
Those are probably the 3 biggest.
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these are what we easily agreed on
never say you want a divorce no matter what unless you do mean it
no infidelity of any kind, no porn, no looking at others in a sexual way
trust, no matter how much it might hurt the other one always tell the truth
open communication
and
before we act w/o are spouse around we think would we do or say this if he/she was here?