Love & Marriage

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aimesnyc
Is it Abuse? (A Resource Guide)
Amy
January 10, 2014 at 11:02 AM

Hi Ladies,

As a future Social Worker, I felt it would be good to have a post in the Love and Marriage group that has information about the different types of abuse - and yes, there is more than just physical abuse.  I have listed some links below, and I hope that everyone will add more resources and /or stories so that we can keep it on top as a primary resource.  Feel free to include resources and information about abuse within an adult relationship, child abuse/neglect, and elder abuse.  It's not a fun topic, but I think it's vital that we have these resources available!

Here are a few links to get us started:

http://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/types-of-abuse

http://www.asafeplacenh.org/abuse_types.html (be sure to donload the brochure!)

http://suite101.com/article/different-types-of-abuse-in-love-relationships-a12723

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm

http://alzheimers.about.com/od/advocates/a/6_types_abuse.htm

Here's a link to a post in the Babies group for more info about domestic violence: http://www.cafemom.com/group/babies/forums/read/17029403/Dv_info?last#last

Replies

  • SaintJudes
    January 9 at 12:44 AM
    Thank you, so what does one do after being abused? That is what I am wondering.
  • Cafe Steph
    January 9 at 11:12 AM

    I'm not sure personally having no experience with it, but the members of this group may have answers for you:

    Domestic Violence Survivors: Power of Being Free

    Quoting SaintJudes: Thank you, so what does one do after being abused? That is what I am wondering.


  • gilbertgrl627
    February 17 at 5:31 PM

    I've tried sending similar links to my sister, but she won't leave. My BIL has said, since she's the one who works full time and works out of state, he'll get custody of my nephew, she'll have to pay him child support, and she won't ever see him if she tries to divorce him. I wish I knew how to help her.

  • Hamlover
    February 25 at 5:22 PM
    I'm so glad to hear that you have carved a new life for yourself. I agree with saying that sometime divorce is a blessing. My uncle went through a very toxic marriage and it was the best day ever when he was divorced and had full custody of my cousin.

    Quoting earthangel1967:

    Thank you... in my first marriage  (if thats what you want to call it ughhh) of 16 yrs I was abused and didnt realize it for a long time. I also kept thinking I could fix him and that if I couldnt "I" was a failure and felt guilty and had to try harder  ... I regret marrying him and I regret not leaving him much much sooner ... it was sooo shocking and so sad when of my 4 kids my two young teens (the oldest 2 ASKED me t leave him)I had thought my kidswould hate me if I left their dad, plus I had no money nowhere to go and no employability skills, they told me they didnt care, they said even living in a shelter would be better .... I left him within 1 hour of them confronting me that way and it was the best thing I ever did.... me and all the kids went thru 2 years of intense poverty once I left but we were close knit and a team and then our lives became better than we'd ever hoped and dreamed and we've been beyond happy ever since. : D


    Sometimes divorce is a blessing and NOT a bad thing!

  • Cafe Steph
    February 26 at 10:06 AM

    It's really difficult to be on the outside looking in on a loved one who's being abused, but if she won't take a stand and move on, then there's nothing you can really do but to be there for her as best as you can in the meantime. That said, she needs to speak to a lawyer and find out what her rights truly are, not rely on the word of her abuser. His goal is to keep her down, keep her there, so he can keep controlling and abusing her. He has no reason to be honest with her.

    Quoting gilbertgrl627:

    I've tried sending similar links to my sister, but she won't leave. My BIL has said, since she's the one who works full time and works out of state, he'll get custody of my nephew, she'll have to pay him child support, and she won't ever see him if she tries to divorce him. I wish I knew how to help her.


  • sarahjz
    by sarahjz
    March 10 at 2:32 PM

    Thank you for the resources.

  • kittycat813
    March 22 at 4:00 AM

    i'm in a 13 year realaship the past 3 year since my parnter been going from male to female she been more control and abuseful and tells all the time she is leaving me I don't what to do I lose and have low self-esteem please help me.

    KristyAnne

    God Bless You

  • Cafe Steph
    June 30 at 2:05 PM

    How are you doing now? Are you still with her?

    Quoting kittycat813:

    i'm in a 13 year realaship the past 3 year since my parnter been going from male to female she been more control and abuseful and tells all the time she is leaving me I don't what to do I lose and have low self-esteem please help me.

    KristyAnne

    God Bless You


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