Love & Marriage

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aimesnyc
Is it Abuse? (A Resource Guide)
Amy
January 10, 2014 at 11:02 AM

Hi Ladies,

As a future Social Worker, I felt it would be good to have a post in the Love and Marriage group that has information about the different types of abuse - and yes, there is more than just physical abuse.  I have listed some links below, and I hope that everyone will add more resources and /or stories so that we can keep it on top as a primary resource.  Feel free to include resources and information about abuse within an adult relationship, child abuse/neglect, and elder abuse.  It's not a fun topic, but I think it's vital that we have these resources available!

Here are a few links to get us started:

http://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/types-of-abuse

http://www.asafeplacenh.org/abuse_types.html (be sure to donload the brochure!)

http://suite101.com/article/different-types-of-abuse-in-love-relationships-a12723

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm

http://alzheimers.about.com/od/advocates/a/6_types_abuse.htm

Here's a link to a post in the Babies group for more info about domestic violence: http://www.cafemom.com/group/babies/forums/read/17029403/Dv_info?last#last

Replies

  • maureen813
    August 13 at 12:03 PM
    I am an LICSW, congratulations!

    Quoting MyasMommy463:

     Thanks for sharing OP.. I am a social worker.. I'm an LMSW... working toward my LCSW and then my R number

  • 74Angel443
    August 26 at 9:10 PM

    No, but a friend invited me to her meditation class.
    This has helped me tremendously.
    I still have panic attacks but less frequently. Along with the anxiety and PTSD but breathing methods and exercises has helped me focus on something small and positive and it subsudes after a while.
    I don't think it will ever fully go away but I survived and I'm alive and that's all that matters.
    Until the next panic attack happens I will stay positive and focused.
    simple smile
    Quoting iluv2read:

     Wow, how scary! I'm glad you got out of that and are safe now, but are you seeing anyone for the PTSD and other lingering effects you're suffering from years of abuse?

    Quoting 74Angel443:


    My first marriage was verbal and mental abuse for years and I didn't realize it until a friend, whom I confided in, told me outright "you are being abused", I laughed at her and said it wasnt, but later realized that it was.Told myself i would never deal with that again, but years later I met a guy who was nice, romantic and just plain great, then when my daughter was six months old his true colors became vivid, he grabbed by the neck, i thought he was going to kill me. That was the start of a ten year marriage that would be full of abuse, physical, mental and verbal, only twice my daughter witnessed it, once when she was 6months and once when she was 3yrs, hopefully she doesn't remember the second time. Because of that I now have PTSD, anxiety, panic attacks and hate crowds and being crowded. 

     


  • princessmom2005
    September 17 at 9:20 AM
    It's hard to admit that you're in an abusive relationship. This is why my ex and I have been divorced for 9 years. I knew I had to get my (then) 8.5 month old daughter (now 11) out of there to keep her safe as well. He still tries to control both of us, but she sees him for what he is and speaks her mind which I truly admire. I wish I'd been that brave. I totally agree with earthangel that divorce can be a blessing. If I'd stayed, I wouldn't have met my boyfriend and Jackson has been the best thing that's happened to us in years. He has no children of his own, but treats my daughter like his little princess.
  • Cafe Steph
    September 19 at 2:01 PM

    Aww, it's so good that you got out and were able to not only find safety but also find someone wonderful to love and to love your daughter, too. :) Congratulations on finding the strength and finding real love like that! :) 

    Quoting princessmom2005: It's hard to admit that you're in an abusive relationship. This is why my ex and I have been divorced for 9 years. I knew I had to get my (then) 8.5 month old daughter (now 11) out of there to keep her safe as well. He still tries to control both of us, but she sees him for what he is and speaks her mind which I truly admire. I wish I'd been that brave. I totally agree with earthangel that divorce can be a blessing. If I'd stayed, I wouldn't have met my boyfriend and Jackson has been the best thing that's happened to us in years. He has no children of his own, but treats my daughter like his little princess.


  • mag1977
    by mag1977
    September 21 at 3:49 PM
    I myself in a verbal abusive marriage. Planning to leave when I do the income tax. So I can buy a car. I don't have a job. My son is homeschooled. My son is from a previous marriage. Gonna stay with my mom for a bit. Gonna get my food handlers certificate. Find a night job. My husband was not abusive when we married. After 4 years got controlling. I do have papers at my moms house that need to be filed. If I were to leave before I file papers. Can he call the cops to send me back to him. I live in Texas. He drains me out of my money that I earn. Hes got no job either.
  • Cafe Steph
    September 22 at 9:22 AM

    I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm not sure what he can or can't do legally speaking. If you call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) they may be able to advise you on how to safely make your way out of that relationship.

    Quoting mag1977: I myself in a verbal abusive marriage. Planning to leave when I do the income tax. So I can buy a car. I don't have a job. My son is homeschooled. My son is from a previous marriage. Gonna stay with my mom for a bit. Gonna get my food handlers certificate. Find a night job. My husband was not abusive when we married. After 4 years got controlling. I do have papers at my moms house that need to be filed. If I were to leave before I file papers. Can he call the cops to send me back to him. I live in Texas. He drains me out of my money that I earn. Hes got no job either.


  • justdhea
    November 1 at 11:15 AM

    Thank you so much for sharing smile mini.

  • SissyAnn141
    November 6 at 8:37 PM

    There are groups on Cafemom for help.

     Please click onto The TIGER to find a group.

  • SissyAnn141
    November 27 at 2:24 AM


    Quoting SissyAnn141:

    There are groups on Cafemom for help.

     Please click onto The TIGER to find a group.


  • HappyMommyToo
    Yesterday at 1:24 PM
    Thank you for sharing.

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