Love & Marriage

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ladymadrox
Hello :)
October 17, 2011 at 3:57 PM

Hi ladies! I am new to the group, and just wanted to share something with you. What would you do if your signifcant other was never romantic? I know he loves me and blah blah, but we never do anything romantic. If I try he thinks it's a joke. What should I do to make things a little more pesonal?

Replies

  • Davina07
    October 17, 2011 at 4:00 PM

    that's kinda funny i have the same problem. i've talked to him about it but still nothing. next step i am going to send him flowers or candy at work maybe that will get his attention and do it back.

  • ladymadrox
    October 17, 2011 at 4:05 PM

    I know! I tried talking to him about it too. I just don't think he ever has been with anyone! ughhh.

    Quoting Davina07:

    that's kinda funny i have the same problem. i've talked to him about it but still nothing. next step i am going to send him flowers or candy at work maybe that will get his attention and do it back.


  • Davina07
    October 17, 2011 at 4:16 PM

    yup im the first girl he's ever lived with. and he really hasn't had time for girls since he was in College. but i guess we wait it out and see if it will change. lol. i talked to his family and they all said the same thing, all the men in the family are like this for the first 3-4 years lol. and im only going on my second. So we will see what happens as time goes on. 



    But i can tell you it gets annoying every once and a while. 

  • MOM3026
    by MOM3026
    October 17, 2011 at 4:18 PM

    Well would you rather him do it because he feels he is forced (which can lead to rentment) or do you want him to do it because he wants to do it? My husband is like that now. He used to be romantic but hasnt been for sometime. I have talked and talked to him about it but it never ended well and he ended up feeling forced to do it which was the opposite of what I wanted. So I mentioned one last time and then left it alone. I have even started leaving love notes in his lunches that I make or writing a love note and putting it in his clipboard. I have called him saying that I wanted to say hey and see how work was going. Or even at times call him to just say that I love him. I don't expect it in return. I just want to show him I love him. I have even stocked the fridge with beer for him without even calling to tell him Im doing so. So when he gets home its there. Do little things that will make him feel good because eventually he will or might come around and want to do the same for you. But don't make them feel like they are forced to do so because I have learned it won't end well and in the end it won't be as meaningful unless they do it on their .

  • AnGLInterrupted
    October 17, 2011 at 8:23 PM

    Welcome to the group.  :)

    Have you tried sending him love notes?  Leave one on his steering wheel before he goes to work..  tape one to the mirror before he shaves in the morning, etc. 

  • 2lilmamas
    October 17, 2011 at 8:29 PM

     Aww everybody needs a little romance.. Hmm tell him how you feel and how you are not joking.

  • AlannaMaria
    October 17, 2011 at 8:44 PM
    Tell him how you feel. I think he doesn't know how to be romantic and gets all shy, so he makes a joke of it.
  • MomToovey
    October 17, 2011 at 10:43 PM

     Welcome to the group!

    This is a touchy subject, because you can't just sit him down and tell him you want him to be more romantic, because then he's only doing it because you told him to, and not because he wants to. I know you said you have tried being romantic with him and he doesn't take it seriously, but I'm wondering what it is you're doing in the first place. Try to do something that HE would think is romantic. For instance, if he likes action movies, rent one and buy his favorite beer. The 2 of you can watch it together and you can sneak some snuggling in during it. He'll appreciate the gesture and you'll get the closeness you've been looking for. Eventually he'll start to realize you like romantic gestures too and he'll try to do something that gets you excited. Good luck!

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