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joulliiveer
Hello, nice to meet all of you. I have a miltary related question
February 6, 2013 at 9:10 AM

I am a mom of a lovely 3 year old but not a military mom.  I have a military related dilemma and thought this was the best place to ask about it :)

My father recently passed away.  He raised me alone and I am his only child.  We were extremely close and I am heart broken.  He served in Vietnam and I have all of his military belongings.  We are having a "Celebration of Life" for him and I wanted to wear his dog tags for the occasion.  I don't want to wear them around my neck.  I was looking to do something more creative like string them on a black ribbon on my wrist or put them on a pin in some way.  I was looking online for suggestions on a creative way to incorporate them subtly when I found that many people find it disrespectful for a civilian to wear them. 

I know they aren't a fashion statement but I thought it would honor him on that day.  The last thing I want to do is offend other retired military friends of his, especially on such a hard day.

Any thoughts?  Is there a better way to honor him or should I just forget it all together?  Or does anyone have a better idea on how to wear them for that day, if I should?

 

 

Replies

  • Cafe MichelleP
    February 6, 2013 at 9:18 AM

    Hello and welcome to the group. I am so sorry for your loss.


    Quoting joulliiveer:

    I am a mom of a lovely 3 year old but not a military mom.  I have a military related dilemma and thought this was the best place to ask about it :)

    My father recently passed away.  He raised me alone and I am his only child.  We were extremely close and I am heart broken.  He served in Vietnam and I have all of his military belongings.  We are having a "Celebration of Life" for him and I wanted to wear his dog tags for the occasion.  I don't want to wear them around my neck.  I was looking to do something more creative like string them on a black ribbon on my wrist or put them on a pin in some way.  I was looking online for suggestions on a creative way to incorporate them subtly when I found that many people find it disrespectful for a civilian to wear them. 

    I know they aren't a fashion statement but I thought it would honor him on that day.  The last thing I want to do is offend other retired military friends of his, especially on such a hard day.

    Any thoughts?  Is there a better way to honor him or should I just forget it all together?  Or does anyone have a better idea on how to wear them for that day, if I should?





  • usmclife58
    February 6, 2013 at 9:23 AM

    Some people just have a stick up their butts. Wear them however you want to wear them and forget what anyone but your father would think.

  • jas_momof2
    February 6, 2013 at 9:47 AM

    This...  I think people get upset when it's a day to day thing, but you're wearing them for a celebration - not adding them to your wardrobe...  Wear them however you wish.  I'm sorry for your loss...

    Quoting usmclife58:

    Some people just have a stick up their butts. Wear them however you want to wear them and forget what anyone but your father would think.


  • adrianna1043
    February 6, 2013 at 1:15 PM
    Yep, this.

    Quoting jas_momof2:

    This...  I think people get upset when it's a day to day thing, but you're wearing them for a celebration - not adding them to your wardrobe...  Wear them however you wish.  I'm sorry for your loss...

    Quoting usmclife58:

    Some people just have a stick up their butts. Wear them however you want to wear them and forget what anyone but your father would think.


  • amonkeymom
    February 6, 2013 at 2:30 PM

    I am so sorry for your loss.

    Quoting joulliiveer:

    I am a mom of a lovely 3 year old but not a military mom.  I have a military related dilemma and thought this was the best place to ask about it :)

    My father recently passed away.  He raised me alone and I am his only child.  We were extremely close and I am heart broken.  He served in Vietnam and I have all of his military belongings.  We are having a "Celebration of Life" for him and I wanted to wear his dog tags for the occasion.  I don't want to wear them around my neck.  I was looking to do something more creative like string them on a black ribbon on my wrist or put them on a pin in some way.  I was looking online for suggestions on a creative way to incorporate them subtly when I found that many people find it disrespectful for a civilian to wear them. 

    I know they aren't a fashion statement but I thought it would honor him on that day.  The last thing I want to do is offend other retired military friends of his, especially on such a hard day.

    Any thoughts?  Is there a better way to honor him or should I just forget it all together?  Or does anyone have a better idea on how to wear them for that day, if I should?




  • gunsgirl
    February 6, 2013 at 3:28 PM

    I would not wear the dog tags, as I also find them disresepectful to wear.  what we did for my grandpa was placed them in a shadow box with a picture of him in his uniform with a small american flag . that was all that was in it and it was very dramatic and simple.

  • JerseyAirGurl
    Ada
    February 6, 2013 at 4:02 PM

    Sorry for you loss... As a servicemember I never really wear my own tags... I personally don't see it disrespectful if you want to wear them or do something with them. It's your way to honor your father, his life and service. 

  • joulliiveer
    February 6, 2013 at 4:10 PM

    I really appreciate all of your responses.  I'm still on the fence about it...

  • arttiger86
    February 6, 2013 at 4:15 PM

    i think this is kind of funny because i noticed everyone that seems to have a problem with you wearing them for an occassion such as this all seem to be "civilians" as i am a veteran.  it all depends on how the dog tags are being handled, think about what your father would want you to do with them. he served this country and as long as his memory is being respected i dont see any issue with it. if you dont know how his friends will respond why not ask them for advice on what exactly to do with the the dog tags. if i was to pass and my son wanted to wear my dog tags to a service such as you want to i wouldn't have an issue i would be an honor that my child felt enough pride in what i did to honor my memory in such a way. dont let others make you feel bad to honor your father in your own way.

  • Armywife081011
    February 7, 2013 at 1:02 AM

    If anybody has a problem with it then thats their prerogative. Everyone has an opinion but what really matters is that you are honoring your father and that was I'm sure a huge part of his life. I'm sure he would be touched that you are honoring the fact that he served his country. 

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