Military Families

first christmas without them
November 17, 2012 at 9:16 PM

can i just say that the closer we get to thanksgiving and xmas the more upset i get.  This will be the first time i have not been with my oldest son for the holidays and i'm having a very hard time with it.  i feel like i'm gonna start crying everytime i think about it (and i dont cry much).  it sounds stupid when i put it out there like this, doesnt it.


  • pittawadda
    November 17, 2012 at 9:24 PM
    To me that seems tougher than Christmas without my husband.
  • sailorwifenmom
    November 17, 2012 at 11:50 PM
    I understand. Our son was gone for the holidays last year, which we had expected because we knew when he was leaving for bootcamp. Then, because of the distance involved, we were traveling to his boot camp graduation (it was early Dec last yr) while our youngest was in Australia with friends.

    This year, he's spending Thanksgiving with his fiancee's family (he hasn't met them yet), and our daughter is several States away at college (she's in marching band and they have to play for the game so she can't come home).

    We are having a friend of hers come though (since she goes to school in NY and we're in MD and her parents are in HI).

    It's hard when your kids grow up, but maybe see if there's a local college or base near you, where you can "sponsor" someone. It's NOT the same of course, but having been a young Sailor far from home, and having hosted many other Sailors over the years, it does help, and it can sort of be like, ok, I'm doing this for someone else's loved one, and I trust someone is doing it for my loved one...

    (((Hugs!!!))) Just like it broke your heart putting them on that school bus for the first time, but it got easier, so will this... Just try to hang in there!
  • sailorwifenmom
    November 17, 2012 at 11:54 PM
    Sorry - traveling over Thanksgiving. We were coming to the States from Japan and because of our flights, we had to travel over the holidays. Our daughter stayed with friends who took her with them to Australia over Thanksgiving break, then back for school until we hot home. (Probably should have explained that, my post was probably confusing).

    The thing is though, it does suck, though it will get a bit better.
  • darbyakeep45
    November 18, 2012 at 5:58 AM

    Not stupid mama!  You have every right to be upset...hugs mama!

  • Sweet_mouse
    November 18, 2012 at 1:49 PM

    thanks everyone.  y'all are very sweet.  

  • Anonymous 1
    by Anonymous 1
    November 18, 2012 at 9:01 PM

    I went through that long time ago and it's toughie.  Sorry you are experiencing this.

  • adoptivemomof1
    November 19, 2012 at 10:04 AM

    Not stupid at all! I get a little sad during the holidays because I haven't been able to spend them with my family in years and years. I miss them more during the holiday season but the distance makes it impossible...I am sorry you are feeling so sad- hugs!

  • socialworker227
    November 21, 2012 at 6:45 AM

     No it doesn't sound stupid at all! Surround yourself with good memories and good times. My husband is deployed so this Thanksgiving and Christmas is difficult for our family. Hang in there!! hugs

  • jessicaconner
    November 21, 2012 at 7:39 PM

    Not only is it not stupid, but it is completely understandable. I'm a military wife of 15 years and my girls and I will be spending the holidays without my husband. Every time is hard. I know how hard it is for me to be without my husband. I can't imagine if it was my child. I hope you have a wonderful holiday and remember there are those of us out there that can relate. You're never alone. The military makes us all a family ( granted a disfunctional one) and families help each other out and stick together.

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