Smarter Living

Would it be terrible if I asked my sister...
by Wish2Be
November 13, 2012 at 8:29 PM

for $70 a month to watch her kids (ages 6 & 9) three nights a week?

I ask this because we would like to move to their complex...and right now she pays her friend $70 a week to watch her girls 3 nights a week. The $70 would help tremendously with our bills since the rent is about $50 more than we can afford spend per month.

We love those girls and they love our son. I would do it for free no question. We were all raised with the understanding that if a family member needs help and we are able...we dont charge them for it.

I am conflicted.

What do you ladies thing? Is it shallow of me to ask?



  • mom2jessnky
    November 15, 2012 at 7:20 AM

    Also on the pawning note, YOU think the guitar is worth $1500 (or whatever) and yeah if you have the time to sell it and find the right buyer it may be. If you go to a Pawn Shop and you're desperate, you're not going to get anything NEAR that. That's how pawn shops work, they aren't going to pay you what the thing is worth, they're going to pay you WAY less because they want to turn around and sell it for what it's worth. They don't stay in business by being nice to desperate people.

    Quoting Rain2Rinse:

    I completely agree. Sorry, OP... You would be incredibly irresponsible if you moved into a place you obviously cannot afford. You can't account for every dime, or water/electric every month. You're putting your family in a bad spot.

    SN: my husband also has many guitars that are worth a few(3-9) thousand dollars. To pawn one to cover the extra $50 is crazy. Especially seeing as how you wouldn't be able to budget in getting them back.

    Quoting mom2jessnky:

    No it's irresponsible.  If you can only afford $700 a month for rent, you CANNOT rent a place that is $750 responsibly. What happens if your electric bill is higher? What happens after all the guitars are pawned?  THIS is why Americans are drowning in debt, because they live beyond their means but justify it by saying stuff like "It's only $50" or "I can pawn..."  If you have to think like that "I can pawn .... to pay rent" you cannot afford to live there. Period.  I get that people do think like that it's ONLY $50 more (25,75, etc) but that's not a responsible way to think.

    I also think it's extremely rude to screw someone out of a job so that you can afford to live in a place beyond your means. What if that person NEEDS that $70 a week, for food? or medicine?  Are you really okay with letting them suffer so you can live somewhere you can't afford? Obviously it's not hurting your sister to pay for the sitter she has now or she wouldn't do it.

    I'm not trying to be mean, but what you're thinking is not okay on a couple levels. I GET wanting to move somewhere else, I do, but sometimes we can't do that. Unless where you're living is unsafe, stay put.

    Quoting Wish2Be:

    My husband has 12 giutars worth anywhere from $500-$1500 each. If something happened...we could always pawn one. Not to mention its not like its several hundred over our price point...its only $50 over our price point per month. So its not irresponsible.

    Quoting mom2jessnky:

    If you can't afford to live where she does you don't move, that's irresponsible. 

    What's to say she says yes to that and 6 months from now loses her job? Or decides that she wants to stay home? Or that she doesn't want to pay her sister to watch her kids anymore?

    Too risky. Not a responsible idea.

  • bether89
    November 15, 2012 at 1:03 PM

     It sounds like the situation would benefit both of you.  I would ask and see what she thinks about it.

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