Moms with Teens

My son just turned 20. Here is what I have learned.
December 19, 2013 at 12:04 PM

My son has just turned 20 and so we have aged out of this group. Here is what I have learned through the teen years.

No teen is all good or all bad (though my son was more toward the bad end of the spectrum). Get to know your kids' friends (especially if they are bad). That way, when you are looking for your kid at one in the morning they will tell you where he is.

Don't let school suck the creativity out of your kid. In the real world we are not asked to sit for hours writing an exam. We are allowed to ask for help, look things up and work as a team.

Sometimes kids need help finding their way. Teach them how to job search, help them write their resumes and take them to places you know may hire them.

Don't be in a rush for them to find their life long career in high school. It's not the end of the world if they don't graduate on time either. Encourage them to try different things, you may be surprised at where they end up and what they are good at and enjoy. If they are not "academics" they are still valuable human beings.

Keep in mind that they are sneaky...if you think it's their friend john texting them be aware it may be their friend kate (they are the ones who have put names to the numbers in their phones) . Also, if you think you have all of their passwords for facebook remember they can open another facebook account under a pseudonym.

And lastly, this too shall pass. Just stick by them, support them, and know that at the other end is an adult that went through a lot of crap as a teen and you couldn't be more proud of the person they have become.



  • atlmom2
    by atlmom2
    December 19, 2013 at 12:23 PM
    I agree. My baby turns 20 next month.
  • GMMC
    by GMMC
    December 19, 2013 at 3:17 PM

    Good Post Mama...!

    And by the sounds of did a good job as well!

  • lnrmom
    by lnrmom
    December 19, 2013 at 3:20 PM
    Good post!
  • createive
    December 19, 2013 at 3:22 PM

    Good one! Thanks for th einsight. DD is 15 and we're going though some of the things you shared. It's nice to hear things like this from another parent who's gone through some of these things!

  • OvrMyHead
    December 19, 2013 at 3:23 PM

     Thanks!!  I like the part about reminding us that not all kids are academics.

  • shamroc374
    December 19, 2013 at 3:31 PM
    Thank you for your post. My son is 18 so we are nearing the end of the teen years too. It has been a bumpy road. My son is more towards the good side but knowing all of his friends and being friendly with them has helped me on several different occasions with good and bad things. Now that he is 18 we are in the rough stage where he is an adult/not quite an adult yet. This stage is easier than the hormonal stage 13-16, but not as easy as the 16/17 stage when he became the child I knew before the puberty monster took over.
  • drfink
    by drfink
    December 19, 2013 at 3:40 PM


  • mumsy2three
    December 19, 2013 at 5:14 PM

    Great post!

    My oldest and only dd is 20. I have 2 sons (11 and 8 y/o) and am kind of worried about having 2 teens in the house at the same time, lol.

  • lunyuny
    by lunyuny
    December 19, 2013 at 5:25 PM

    Ds1 turns 20 on the 28th.  Time went so quickly.  Ds2 is 18 about to graduate army bct  Such awesome young men they have become.

  • boys2men2soon
    December 19, 2013 at 9:27 PM

    clappingWell said!     My baby boy turned 20 last month.    Your words really hit home.  It is amazing that issues that seemed so important a couple short years ago seem so trivial looking back!

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