Moms with Teens

fantasticfour
He has finally stepped up to being a FATHER
March 26, 2013 at 10:38 PM

 Lets hope this lasts.  My 16 year old son, like I told my husband, he's the apple that didn't even hit the grown but stuck in a lower branch he's so much like his dad. 

This has been causing marital problems between me and hubby lately and last night I finally put my foot down when I found a few hundred dollars missing from my room.  Yes I believe my son took it. He took a laptop, hard drives, candy (which was right above the money), and also my daughter had money go missing TWICE already in the last few weeks and he was seen coming out of her room with her not in there.

Well this morning, hubby told him to get the homework he did this weekend and turn it in.  To take the paper he had with all his missing work and get the ones he turned in initialed off on.  He was told that he needed to make things right with me today.

This is what happened.  He came home, sat in the kitchen (I was in the living room in sight of him the entire time) until I told him to leave the kitchen the girls needed to eat supper.  He didn't say a word to me, not hi, kiss my butt, nothing.   When his Dad got home (late) he walked in his room and there was the boy waiting to be pat on the head and told to shower and eat something and he was just asked did you do this?  No.  DId you do that?  No.  What did I say was going to happen?  Lose my bed.  Well you lost it.  He took his matress off the bed and said he would take the rest of it tomorrow.  That boy SCREAMED until 8:55pm!  My youngest (12) was screaming back to go to sleep, shut up, no one's coming to your pity party, quit being a baby, etc.  I finally told her when she came out to tell me she couldn't take it anymore, tell him to keep screaming because if he's screaming at 9pm I'm going to give her ice cream. Boy that made him stop lol!

Dad did right, he refused to go in there because he knew he would be "chatting" if he did and didn't want to give him the attention he was trying to get.  FIRST TIME!!!

Replies

  • MamaSnaps
    March 26, 2013 at 10:46 PM

    I really am glad that you are getting some help here. I just have to say a LOVE your reverse psychology! You did an awesome job of beating him at his own game!!!

    Quoting fantasticfour:

      I finally told her when she came out to tell me she couldn't take it anymore, tell him to keep screaming because if he's screaming at 9pm I'm going to give her ice cream. Boy that made him stop lol!



  • wakymom
    by wakymom
    March 27, 2013 at 8:55 AM

    I agree that ice cream bit was brilliant! I'm going to file that away in case I need it down the road : )

    Glad your dh finally stepped up on this. Hope it continues!

    Quoting MamaSnaps:

    I really am glad that you are getting some help here. I just have to say a LOVE your reverse psychology! You did an awesome job of beating him at his own game!!!

    Quoting fantasticfour:

      I finally told her when she came out to tell me she couldn't take it anymore, tell him to keep screaming because if he's screaming at 9pm I'm going to give her ice cream. Boy that made him stop lol!









  • chattycassie
    March 27, 2013 at 9:38 AM

     That icecream thing was GREAT omg I may have to use it in the future.

  • MrsBLB
    by MrsBLB
    March 27, 2013 at 11:31 AM

    Right on!

  • drfink
    by drfink
    March 27, 2013 at 5:40 PM

    Good deal !

  • boys2men2soon
    March 27, 2013 at 10:14 PM

    I agree, the Ice Cream deal was genius!    I hope you Dh keeps up the good work.

  • daisykat
    March 27, 2013 at 11:09 PM
    Did your son deny taking that money? I'm assuming he did... what would he have spent it on? I'd be making him work it off. When did this defiant attitude start? Wow, that's a tough one to deal with. How does Dad usually handle it?
  • PurpleHazey
    March 28, 2013 at 8:51 AM

    That is good news, kids really make it hard on the relationship between the parents!

  • fantasticfour
    March 28, 2013 at 9:17 AM

     Of course he did.  Just like he denied taking everything else I caught him with.  As for the money I'm pretty sure he spent it on candy at school.  There was a time when he had so much candy wrappers in his backpack and was telling me his friends gave it to him. My friend, who's son is his friend, told me he was buying candy but I couldn't figure out where he was getting the money.  My middle daughter has been missing money too.

    As far as how Dad usually handles it?  He doesn't.  Prime example, son and daughter are 3 FEET away from us arguing about something.  He's sitting on the couch with me looking at him.  Daughter screams ouch and I get up.  He's still sitting on the couch.  He doesn't normally do ANYTHING about it.  He might yell at him once in a while, but he usually ends up pandering to him at the end of it.

    Quoting daisykat:

    Did your son deny taking that money? I'm assuming he did... what would he have spent it on? I'd be making him work it off. When did this defiant attitude start? Wow, that's a tough one to deal with. How does Dad usually handle it?

     

  • MamaSnaps
    March 28, 2013 at 5:57 PM

    Mine has that uncanny ability to not hear or see anthing going on around him. Which has always made me the bad guy and now my 15 year old and I don't get along because I am such a bitch. I have rules. 

    Dad has rules too, but he manages to block everything out. When I scream over them  "Um... Ragnar??? Do you hear them???" He answers with "huh? What?" 

    So, while he has the same rules, he is blissfully ignorant of the behavior going on literally within inches of him. That makes the kids think I am the bitch that won't let them swear, fight or misbehave and dad will let them do anything.

    He doesn't LET them, he flat out doesn't even hear it.

    Makes me want to beat him to within an inch of his life! We keep a squirt bottle on my desk and by his chair to keep the birds showered with. I have taken to squirting him when he's blocking them out. LOL! 

    (obviously not his real name!)

    Quoting fantasticfour:

     Of course he did.  Just like he denied taking everything else I caught him with.  As for the money I'm pretty sure he spent it on candy at school.  There was a time when he had so much candy wrappers in his backpack and was telling me his friends gave it to him. My friend, who's son is his friend, told me he was buying candy but I couldn't figure out where he was getting the money.  My middle daughter has been missing money too.

    As far as how Dad usually handles it?  He doesn't.  Prime example, son and daughter are 3 FEET away from us arguing about something.  He's sitting on the couch with me looking at him.  Daughter screams ouch and I get up.  He's still sitting on the couch.  He doesn't normally do ANYTHING about it.  He might yell at him once in a while, but he usually ends up pandering to him at the end of it.

    Quoting daisykat:

    Did your son deny taking that money? I'm assuming he did... what would he have spent it on? I'd be making him work it off. When did this defiant attitude start? Wow, that's a tough one to deal with. How does Dad usually handle it?

     


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